Okay, so technically I haven't watched the ENTIRE PPV yet, but I have checked for the results. Here is my opinion of the outcomes of WWE No Way Out 2009.
This is the last PPV before Wrestlemania 25: WWE's biggest PPV ever. Most likely the champions who walk out of this show with the gold, will be the ones walking in with the gold at Wrestlemania.
With that in mind:
WWE CHAMPIONSHIP
ELIMINATION CHAMBER MATCH
WWE Champion Edge vs. The Undertaker vs. Triple H vs. The Big Show vs. Jeff Hardy vs. Vladimir Kozlov
Edge was eliminated early, guarunteeing us a new Champion. Awesome, right? What could be better for Wrestlemania's 25th Anniversary than a brand spanking new Champion who has never main-evented WWE's biggest PPV of the year? For anyone not reading this properly, I was really hoping Jeff Hardy would regain his title and move on to main event the show as WWE Champion.
Big Show is eliminated. Kozlov is eliminated. Then Jeff is eliminated and I've lost all but the faintest interest in this match. Don't get me wrong, had it been any other match, I would've really enjoyed the final minutes between Triple H and The Deadman, but then I remembered that this is for the WWE Championship, and that the winner would most likely go into 'Mania as the Champion, and I knew instantly who would win.
To it's credit, the match was solid, with Jeff hitting a nice Swanton off the top of one of the pods. The crowd was really into it. Even after Jeff was eliminated, the entire arena was split down the center with chants for both 'Taker and The Game. But I think we all knew who would win, and sure enough, even after a TOMBSTONE PILEDRIVER WHICH NO ONE KICKS OUT OF EVER, Triple H comes back and captures his 13th...YES, YOU READ THAT RIGHT: 13 WORLD CHAMPIONSHIP. Ric Flair's legacy will die when Triple H attempts to replace it with his own.
WINNER: Triple H
MY THOUGHTS: Why?
No, honestly: why?
Triple H has main evented almost every Wrestlemania since 2001. Why couldn't he just let this one be a fresh start for the company by letting someone like Jeff Hardy carry the title in, signifying a new era in the company and a fresh start for WWE as a whole? Instead, the 25th anniversary of this spectacle will be just another chance to reminisce about every Wrestlemania for the past 8 years, which all prominently featured Triple H. I envision a Triple Threat match for the WWE Championship between The Game, Jeff Hardy, and Vladimir Kozlov, but of course, I don't expect either of the latter two to win. This is the 25th Anniversary of Wrestlemania, after all: it's only fitting we uphold a "true" icon like Triple H. Thirteen title reigns is not all that impressive when your reigns are a mere 10 months apart.
I'm not sure why Triple H feels he needs this title anymore. He already gets a huge ovation from the crowd, already sells more merchandise than most of the roster (save for Cena and Hardy), and even with Jeff Hardy's mega-success on the same brand, has remained one of WWE's top 5 most popular superstars. Why does he need the WWE Championship anymore? We might as well have Hogan or maybe even The Rock come back and win it for no apparent reason. It makes just as much sense at this point, and quite frankly (it pains me to say this) would be infinitely more entertaining.
Shane McMahon vs. Randy Orton
WINNER: Randy Orton
MY THOUGHTS: I have not seen this match yet. Simply looking at the results, the only thing I can say is that I'm thrilled to see Orton get the victory. After becoming one of the most successful heels in recent years, I would've hated to see Orton get buried by another ploy by the McMahons to steal the spotlight from their talent. Orton is right where he should be: at the top. The beatdown by Shane on Raw was ridiculous and made Orton look foolish and weak. Orton has stood his ground against the likes of Triple H, The Undertaker, Shawn Michaels, and other true SUPERstars. Why would he suddenly back down when his boss's son shows up? Hopefully Orton will be inserted into the main event for the World Heavyweight Championship at Wrestlemania 25. He may be a heel, but he is the biggest heel on any brand right now, and that should be claim enough.
ECW CHAMPIONSHIP
ECW Champion Jack Swagger vs. Finlay
WINNER: Jack Swagger
MY THOUGHTS: I didn't see this match, either, but I like the direction ECW is going in, using veterans to put over fresh young talent. I still prefer Matt Hardy as Champion, but I think his feud with Jeff will give him a bigger push. Hopefully this will put Christian in the ECW Championship match at Wrestlemania.
ALL OR NOTHING MATCH
Shawn Michaels vs. John "Bradshaw" Layfield
I thought this match came off a bit anticlimactic, but in hindsight, it worked well. Shawn came out fighting after getting some inspiration from his wife at ringside (Rabecca is an astoundingly beautiful woman). His momentum was eventually stopped by JBL's offense. The match had some nice psychology to it. JBL tried to use Michaels' rage to get him disqualified, offering HBK a chair to hit him with. HBK paused a moment, then threw the chair aside, realizing a DQ would mean servitude to JBL for life.
The next stages consisted largely of HBK getting beaten down with several powerful moves from JBL, including two Clotheslines From Hell. When JBL went to confront HBK on the outside, Bradshaw was slapped by Shawn's wife, and Shawn used that to gain momentum enough to hit all his signatures, including a scoop slam, elbow drop, and a VERY Sweet Chin Music all in succession for the win: a routine that hasn't been done uninterrupted for quite some time, and was never more rewarding. Shawn left with his wife in tow, and the two celebrated their victory, and Shawn's emancipation, on the ramp before the show moved on.
WINNER: Shawn Michaels
MY THOUGHTS: There are two things that bother me about this match. The first is part of the psychology to it. Bradshaw hit TWO Clotheslines from Hell on Shawn back to back, but rather than go for the cover, threw HBK to the outside onto the floor. Why wouldn't you cover him? It's an easy win!
The second thing that bothered me about this match was that it finished rather abruptly. All of a sudden Shawn was in control, and then all at once the match was over. Shawn knows how to build anticipation in the crowd. He showed us that countless times (his street fight with Vince McMahon at Wrestlemania 22 is a great example of how he can turn any match into a showstealer). I'm not sure what the cause was for the apparent quick finish, but it was sweet nonetheless, and the crowd was behind Shawn the whole way.
I could also complain that Shawn should've lost by default when his wife interfered, but I won't. In any case, this should free Shawn up for a fresh feud at Wrestlemania, though I don't know who is on the roster worth facing that Shawn hasn't already faced.
WORLD HEAVYWEIGHT CHAMPIONSHIP
ELIMINATION CHAMBER MATCH
World Heavyweight Champion John Cena vs. Kofi Kingston vs. Rey Mysterio vs. Chris Jericho vs. Kane vs. Mike Knox
Well, that's how it was billed, anyway. Unfortunately, just as Kofi Kingston was making his way down to the ring, he was attacked from behind by an angry and frustrated Edge (yes, Smackdown!'s Edge). Kingston was knocked unconcious and deemed not to wrestle. As Kofi was taken out on a stretcher, Edge forced himself into one of the pods inside the chamber. Referees did not move to stop him, and he was locked inside, officially now part of the match.
It would come down to Edge and Rey Mysterio. Cena's elimination, like that of Edge in the first Chamber match, guaranteed the fans a new Champion.
The crowd was strongly and solidly behind Rey for the entire final stage of this match. There were many near falls and pinning combinations that were some of the most exciting moments of anticipation in recent memory. Finally Edge pinned Rey to capture the victory, and, presumably, the title.
WINNER: Edge
MY THOUGHTS: This was exciting, and certainly entertaining. Edge inserting himself into the match brings up a string of questions to be answered on Raw. Is his win legitimate? Does have any real claim to the Championship? What will John Cena and the other participants have to say? What does this mean for Wrestlemania?
While this has sparked a wave of controversey in the WWE Universe, I'm a bit tired of the Edge screw jobs. While they have been creative (in that they don't all end in DQ finishes), it's almost expected now that Edge will steal the headlines depending on who he screws over next. Granted, this builds an incredibly strong heel character for Edge, and keeps him at the top of the ladder. I picture Edge going into 'Mania as the Champion. Unfortunately, there really is only one here the WWE will send in to vanquish the Ultimate Opportunist: John Cena. While I think John deserves to main event the biggest show of the year (he is still WWE's biggest superstar) I've grown weary of his 'Mania victories. The only match Cena ever lost at Wrestlemania was his loss to Randy Orton in the Triple Threat match for the WWE Championship at Wrestlemania 24. Cena has defeated the likes of Big Show, JBL, Triple H, and Shawn Michaels at every Wrestlemania since 2002, all involving championship gold. It is likely that if Cena faces Edge at Wrestlemania 25, it will be to win back the World Heavyweight Championship, and frankly, I'm tired of the same old song and dance.
FINAL THOUGHTS: The popular saying in professional wrestling is that "you're only as good as your next show". It will be interesting to see what WWE does in the aftermath of this controversial PPV that saw the crowning of two new World Champions. While I am not thrilled with a couple of the finishes, I'm glad to see things happening here that are getting fans' attention.
Overall, I'd give this show a 7/10. The Shane/Orton feud reminds me a lot of the old feuds from the Attitude Era, where it wasn't about wins and losses, but deep, personal rivalries that fans could get into. The other matches were good performances all around (those which I saw), and HBK getting out from underneath JBL's thumb is a relief to almost every fan out there. However, there is a lack of representation here, particularly for the WWE and World Tag Team Championships, the Intercontinental and United States titles, and the women's division was nowhere to be found. Back on the positive side: clean finishes all around! No DQ's, no count outs, just good, clean wrestling! Major props to WWE for FINALLY giving fans what they paid to see: pay-offs!
As for my Wrestlemania predictions: I'll post those in a new blog entry following tonight's Raw.
Also, for those who haven't heard, the 2009 WWE Draft Lottery will be held Monday, April 13, 2009 on Raw. I'll be giving my picks for those moves in an upcoming entry.
Ladies and gentlemen: this is the home stretch on the Road to Wrestlemania 25!
Monday, February 16, 2009
Tuesday, January 27, 2009
Pick up the Pace
I could talk about a lot of things in the world of professional wrestling.
I could talk about how I actually like John Cena since his return because of better character portrayal and development.
I could talk about how great it was to finally see Jeff Hardy capture his first World Championship and take his place atop the pro wrestling mountain as WWE Champion.
I could talk about the idiotic move to strip Jeff Hardy of said title despite the fact that he gets the biggest ovation of any superstar in the WWE and sells more tickets and merchandise than the rest of the roster.
I want to talk about wrestling. Not characters, or storylines, or politics. I want to talk about straight-up, stripped down wrestling.
About a year ago I started watching Total Nonstop Action Wrestling. At the time, I was fed up with the politics that hindered the potential success of WWE's product. Men like Triple H and JBL were continuously put over Jeff Hardy and C.M. Punk who were struggling to break through the trademark glass ceiling while fans begged to seem them rise to the top of WWE's talent pool.
So I turned to TNA: the infamous upstart promotion that has gained national success using the platform provided by SpikeTV. Rabid anti-WWE fans have openly praised TNA for it's allegedly superior product. For the longest time I ignored the promises of smarter booking, more engaging storylines and characters, more intense wrestling, and an overall better product.
After almost a whole year of watching TNA, I can honestly that TNA has been an overall disappointment.
Nothing has changed in TNA. Despite signing huge names and cultivating tremendous and truly diverse talent, TNA insists on putting over the same men each and every month: coincidentally all former WWE and WCW stars. With the glaring exception of Samoa Joe's title reign, the only men to hold the TNA World Heavyweight Championship are Sting and Kurt Angle. The recent formation of the Main Event Mafia is further proof that TNA is obsessed with keeping former stars from other organizations at the forefront of their company.
The push of the well-worn out Team 3D and the return of Jeff Jarrett haven't helped boost ratings. No matter what TNA does, it has yet to peak beyond a 1.3 rating, and their marketing department has yet to help position the company into a competitive slot in the pro wrestling market where they can help grow their business.
It is hard for me to say this, but WWE has the best characters, storylines, and booking available to a nation-wide audience. I am much more excited to see a veteran like Shawn Michaels than I am to see TNA's version of Sting or Kurt Angle. Shawn has character and depth that even Kurt and the legendary Sting can't come close to matching. Men like Chris Jericho and Randy Orton know how to draw arenas full of thousands to their attention. It is difficult for TNA's heels to get fans to truly hate them and listen to what they have to say.
But as for the actual sport of professional wrestling, TNA presents the type of product most fans are looking for. It is fast-paced, logically constructed, and even some ridiculous finishes seem more engaging because the match itself was just that good.
As pointed out by Jim Forzeze of www.1wrestling.com, professional wrestling is losing fans to boxing and UFC because it presents more realistic and more intense confronations. Meanwhile, WWE continues to present the same slow-paced matches, regardless of weight-class. Even the "high-flying" Rey Mysterio wrestles a similar style to Triple H. The style of the once "extreme" Jeff Hardy is almost indistinguishable from that of Shelton Benjamin or MVP. Then there is the "new and improved" Great Khali. Perhaps the most ridiculous gimmick on television, the Khali Kiss-Cam (what were they smoking?) becomes even more nightmarish when this plodding behemoth is expected to compete with actual wrestlers. There is no diversity of style, and unless changes are made, fans will continue to seek alternate forms of entertainment.
I understand that Vince does not want to risk injury to his talent by allowing them to take unnecessary risk, but without some measure of risk there will be no reason for fans to tune in because each match will be just like the last. Even the most colorful of characters will begin to blend together when they wrestle the same matches.
Stone Cold Steve Austin is due to be inducted into the WWE Hall of Fame. I'm sure Austin will be making appearances on WWE TV to promote Wrestlemania and his Hall of Fame induction, and I'm sure Vince believes that Austin's appearance will bring fans of the Attitude Era flocking back to his product. The sad truth however, is that this will not be the case.
Stone Cold is a great character, and Steve Williams does an incredible job of keeping that character alive. But the fact that fans will not want to admit, is that Austin's character is tired and needs to be revamped, rather than simply revived. For the past several years, Austin has done the same song and dance: he tells a funny story, cuts a funny promo, stuns Vince McMahon, and drinks beer.
Austin's character was best when he had something to fight for. But now that Vince McMahon's character has become more of a parody of what it used to be, there is no threat to Austin, which means there is no tension. If there is no tension, why is Austin stunning McMahon? Because he's a crazy redneck? That's not what made Austin great. Austin was great because he represented the quiet unrest of the everyman; or rather, the open rebellion of the working class against the opression of their bosses. Since we know Austin is retired and will live the rest of his life sitting on a mountain of checks signed by the McMahon family, there is no plausible reason for him to be beating up the man who is ensuring his financial well-being for the rest of his life.
That is just one example of the ludicrous decisions by WWE's creative staff. Simply putting two men in the ring and telling them to fight does not make sense. Having them fight at a slow, crawling pace does not help.
The 25th Anniversary of Wrestlemania is just around the corner, which should help produce some of the best storylines in recent years, but only if the creative department is given the resources and permission to explore areas that fans will want to explore with them.
In short, my plea to WWE is to take risks, both physically, and creatively. Better storylines, better-defined characters, and faster, more exciting matches will help make Wrestlemania 25 the biggest even in the history of professional wrestling.
I could talk about how I actually like John Cena since his return because of better character portrayal and development.
I could talk about how great it was to finally see Jeff Hardy capture his first World Championship and take his place atop the pro wrestling mountain as WWE Champion.
I could talk about the idiotic move to strip Jeff Hardy of said title despite the fact that he gets the biggest ovation of any superstar in the WWE and sells more tickets and merchandise than the rest of the roster.
I want to talk about wrestling. Not characters, or storylines, or politics. I want to talk about straight-up, stripped down wrestling.
About a year ago I started watching Total Nonstop Action Wrestling. At the time, I was fed up with the politics that hindered the potential success of WWE's product. Men like Triple H and JBL were continuously put over Jeff Hardy and C.M. Punk who were struggling to break through the trademark glass ceiling while fans begged to seem them rise to the top of WWE's talent pool.
So I turned to TNA: the infamous upstart promotion that has gained national success using the platform provided by SpikeTV. Rabid anti-WWE fans have openly praised TNA for it's allegedly superior product. For the longest time I ignored the promises of smarter booking, more engaging storylines and characters, more intense wrestling, and an overall better product.
After almost a whole year of watching TNA, I can honestly that TNA has been an overall disappointment.
Nothing has changed in TNA. Despite signing huge names and cultivating tremendous and truly diverse talent, TNA insists on putting over the same men each and every month: coincidentally all former WWE and WCW stars. With the glaring exception of Samoa Joe's title reign, the only men to hold the TNA World Heavyweight Championship are Sting and Kurt Angle. The recent formation of the Main Event Mafia is further proof that TNA is obsessed with keeping former stars from other organizations at the forefront of their company.
The push of the well-worn out Team 3D and the return of Jeff Jarrett haven't helped boost ratings. No matter what TNA does, it has yet to peak beyond a 1.3 rating, and their marketing department has yet to help position the company into a competitive slot in the pro wrestling market where they can help grow their business.
It is hard for me to say this, but WWE has the best characters, storylines, and booking available to a nation-wide audience. I am much more excited to see a veteran like Shawn Michaels than I am to see TNA's version of Sting or Kurt Angle. Shawn has character and depth that even Kurt and the legendary Sting can't come close to matching. Men like Chris Jericho and Randy Orton know how to draw arenas full of thousands to their attention. It is difficult for TNA's heels to get fans to truly hate them and listen to what they have to say.
But as for the actual sport of professional wrestling, TNA presents the type of product most fans are looking for. It is fast-paced, logically constructed, and even some ridiculous finishes seem more engaging because the match itself was just that good.
As pointed out by Jim Forzeze of www.1wrestling.com, professional wrestling is losing fans to boxing and UFC because it presents more realistic and more intense confronations. Meanwhile, WWE continues to present the same slow-paced matches, regardless of weight-class. Even the "high-flying" Rey Mysterio wrestles a similar style to Triple H. The style of the once "extreme" Jeff Hardy is almost indistinguishable from that of Shelton Benjamin or MVP. Then there is the "new and improved" Great Khali. Perhaps the most ridiculous gimmick on television, the Khali Kiss-Cam (what were they smoking?) becomes even more nightmarish when this plodding behemoth is expected to compete with actual wrestlers. There is no diversity of style, and unless changes are made, fans will continue to seek alternate forms of entertainment.
I understand that Vince does not want to risk injury to his talent by allowing them to take unnecessary risk, but without some measure of risk there will be no reason for fans to tune in because each match will be just like the last. Even the most colorful of characters will begin to blend together when they wrestle the same matches.
Stone Cold Steve Austin is due to be inducted into the WWE Hall of Fame. I'm sure Austin will be making appearances on WWE TV to promote Wrestlemania and his Hall of Fame induction, and I'm sure Vince believes that Austin's appearance will bring fans of the Attitude Era flocking back to his product. The sad truth however, is that this will not be the case.
Stone Cold is a great character, and Steve Williams does an incredible job of keeping that character alive. But the fact that fans will not want to admit, is that Austin's character is tired and needs to be revamped, rather than simply revived. For the past several years, Austin has done the same song and dance: he tells a funny story, cuts a funny promo, stuns Vince McMahon, and drinks beer.
Austin's character was best when he had something to fight for. But now that Vince McMahon's character has become more of a parody of what it used to be, there is no threat to Austin, which means there is no tension. If there is no tension, why is Austin stunning McMahon? Because he's a crazy redneck? That's not what made Austin great. Austin was great because he represented the quiet unrest of the everyman; or rather, the open rebellion of the working class against the opression of their bosses. Since we know Austin is retired and will live the rest of his life sitting on a mountain of checks signed by the McMahon family, there is no plausible reason for him to be beating up the man who is ensuring his financial well-being for the rest of his life.
That is just one example of the ludicrous decisions by WWE's creative staff. Simply putting two men in the ring and telling them to fight does not make sense. Having them fight at a slow, crawling pace does not help.
The 25th Anniversary of Wrestlemania is just around the corner, which should help produce some of the best storylines in recent years, but only if the creative department is given the resources and permission to explore areas that fans will want to explore with them.
In short, my plea to WWE is to take risks, both physically, and creatively. Better storylines, better-defined characters, and faster, more exciting matches will help make Wrestlemania 25 the biggest even in the history of professional wrestling.
Tuesday, October 14, 2008
A Short Sweet Lesson
Okay, so I just wanted to make a quick point.
I'm a WWE fan through and through, and for all the criticizing I do of Vince and Co., I will always be a WWE fan.
I always manage to catch RAW...I may miss three or four a year. With the magic of DVR, I catch it every week no matter where I am or what I'm doing.
Also with the magic of DVR I'm able to watch TNA, which I would otherwise be unable to enjoy because I'm working both Thursdays and Saturdays: the two nights it broadcasts SpikeTV.
I don't always get around to TNA, so I have about two months of shows stocked up on my box at home. I just whipped out the July 24 edition to see Matt Morgan squash...hell, I don't even know what his name was because I wasn't paying attention to him. I was paying attention to Morgan.
TNA had been trying to get Morgan over for months. Morgan would cut some mediocre promo and then come out and squash somebody Goldberg-style, and no one cared. The crowd continued to sit on their hands for both halves of this segment.
I don't like the image Matt Morgan gives. It goes beyond being a simple "Golberg/Batista/Lashley/Lesnar" clone. In an age where professional wrestling is constantly under the microscope TNA pushes Matt Morgan with this, and I quote "Genetically jacked" superstar. That's not just a catchphrase. That's a moniker. One that never fails to air every week he's on.
Wow. Wonder what all the fuss is about when it comes to "performance enhancement in entertainment", eh?
I'm not saying Morgan is on steroids. I don't know anything about the man to make that assessment. He certainly isn't as veiny as Batista or Triple H, so I'm willing to give him the benefit of the doubt.
Anyway, his squashes were quick and meaningless for weeks, even months, and despite being in fairly prominent storylines, even involving Jim Cornette, it seemed Morgan was destined to flounder like so many before him. Remember: this is the same man who debuted as a stuttering powerhouse in WWE no so many years ago.
Then I watch this edition of iMPACT: July 24. Morgan comes out, no prep, no promo, not even a promotional shot before commercial. He just comes out. In about three and a half minutes he squashes this guy...again, I forget his name and it's not really important. What IS important is the fact that he got the biggest pop of the night.
The moral of the story: you can use as many "performance enhancers" as you want. You can have creative script out the best storyline, and you can rehearse the best promo ever written for the camera. But what's going to get you over is what you do IN THE RING, BELL TO BELL. Everything else simply enhances that experience. Morgan's match on this episode was not intertwined with any creative thread. There were no titles on the line, not even a title shot on the line. It was simnple wrestling. He had the crowd in the palm of his hand.
This should have instantly put a nail in the coffin of WWE's trademark 15-minute monologues (I'm talking to YOU, Hunter). But of course, TNA is not even on Vince's radar, so he'll just keep doing what he's doing until TNA poses some "real" threat to his company.
Oh, the irony.
I'm a WWE fan through and through, and for all the criticizing I do of Vince and Co., I will always be a WWE fan.
I always manage to catch RAW...I may miss three or four a year. With the magic of DVR, I catch it every week no matter where I am or what I'm doing.
Also with the magic of DVR I'm able to watch TNA, which I would otherwise be unable to enjoy because I'm working both Thursdays and Saturdays: the two nights it broadcasts SpikeTV.
I don't always get around to TNA, so I have about two months of shows stocked up on my box at home. I just whipped out the July 24 edition to see Matt Morgan squash...hell, I don't even know what his name was because I wasn't paying attention to him. I was paying attention to Morgan.
TNA had been trying to get Morgan over for months. Morgan would cut some mediocre promo and then come out and squash somebody Goldberg-style, and no one cared. The crowd continued to sit on their hands for both halves of this segment.
I don't like the image Matt Morgan gives. It goes beyond being a simple "Golberg/Batista/Lashley/Lesnar" clone. In an age where professional wrestling is constantly under the microscope TNA pushes Matt Morgan with this, and I quote "Genetically jacked" superstar. That's not just a catchphrase. That's a moniker. One that never fails to air every week he's on.
Wow. Wonder what all the fuss is about when it comes to "performance enhancement in entertainment", eh?
I'm not saying Morgan is on steroids. I don't know anything about the man to make that assessment. He certainly isn't as veiny as Batista or Triple H, so I'm willing to give him the benefit of the doubt.
Anyway, his squashes were quick and meaningless for weeks, even months, and despite being in fairly prominent storylines, even involving Jim Cornette, it seemed Morgan was destined to flounder like so many before him. Remember: this is the same man who debuted as a stuttering powerhouse in WWE no so many years ago.
Then I watch this edition of iMPACT: July 24. Morgan comes out, no prep, no promo, not even a promotional shot before commercial. He just comes out. In about three and a half minutes he squashes this guy...again, I forget his name and it's not really important. What IS important is the fact that he got the biggest pop of the night.
The moral of the story: you can use as many "performance enhancers" as you want. You can have creative script out the best storyline, and you can rehearse the best promo ever written for the camera. But what's going to get you over is what you do IN THE RING, BELL TO BELL. Everything else simply enhances that experience. Morgan's match on this episode was not intertwined with any creative thread. There were no titles on the line, not even a title shot on the line. It was simnple wrestling. He had the crowd in the palm of his hand.
This should have instantly put a nail in the coffin of WWE's trademark 15-minute monologues (I'm talking to YOU, Hunter). But of course, TNA is not even on Vince's radar, so he'll just keep doing what he's doing until TNA poses some "real" threat to his company.
Oh, the irony.
Tuesday, September 30, 2008
A Very Reluctant RAW
It's funny how WWE seems to be contradicting themselves lately. In the midst of what is clearly a very positive "youth movement" in the company, veterans like Triple H, HBK, JBL, and Batista remain at the forefront. Even recent World Champion C.M. Punk seems to have been demoted to mid-card status once again, now stuck on the same rung as rising stars such as Kofi Kingston and Evan Bourne. Nevertheless, this is a very positive direction for the company that fans are clearly supportive of.
The show opened with Batista going one on one with Santino Marella. There is no denying Marella's charisma, so I wonder why he is being mowed down by the rather stiff and stale "Animal". I actually look forward to seeing the Honk-a-meter every week! I'm not sure if that's a comment on WWE's lack of creativity, or a testament to Santino's entertainment value, but either way, it gets me to tune in.
One thing I am tired of is Batista's smile. Even as Santino clearly insults "The Animal"'s brain power, Dave stands in the ring, grinning at the man he is about to squash. The man is cutting a promo and Batista is laughing at him. One thing that I agree wholeheartedly on is something Mick Foley wrote: you should ALWAYS react to your opponent's promos against you. If you laugh at the promo, you laugh at the man, which makes it harder for that man to sell tickets. I know Santino is there for comic relief, but it makes Dave look stupid, too. "Look at him laughing at himself! Ha, ha! What an idiot!" Then he goes and squashes Marella (who is STILL Intercontinental Champion) and all of a sudden we're supposed to believe Dave is some kind of bad-ass who takes pleasure in beating people up. He's not angry. He just gets off on it. Wow. That will sell tickets.
The Miz beat JTG in a one-on-one match. This was pretty entertaining. Again, a good sign of pumping fresh blood into the company. Miz has come a long way, and I will admit that he is more entertaining than I could ever have given him credit for when he started over on Smackdown! with his "Red Rooster" haircut and terrible "Reality Check" gimmick (though his finisher still bears that name...) The only flaw in this match was the finish. Morrison distracts JTG, only to be tripped up by Shad on the ring apron. Despite the clean-up by Shad, JTG REMAINS distracted long enough for Miz to pick up the win. What is the point of having your partner there breaking up distractions if you're going to be distracted anyway? Silly finish altogether, though the match was a fairly entertaining bout.
I'm not sure what WWE expects us to think of Jamie Noble. Wrestling fans don't tune in so they can root for the heartbroken redneck who can't nab the girl that's WAY out of his league. They ARE the heartbroken rednecks who can't nab the girl because she's WAY out of their league. That's what makes them angry. That's what makes them watch wrestling! They don't want to play the violin, they want vengeance, damnit! Cold, hard, remorseless vengeance. Having Jamie job to the couple of the week is not going to win him any fans or cause people to tune in. If he turned out to be some "love crusader", defeating his opponents in the name of "true love", that might help. Sure it'd be just as terrible, but it might help him get over.
Anyway, Jamie proves that he can at least have lady friends in a very platonic sense because he manages to get the lovely and talented Mickie James as his tag team partner against Paul and Katie Lea Burchill. This was a descent intergender match (which means the guys CAN wrestle the girls and vice versa). Jamie picks up a nice win that he can throw in the face of William Regal and his eye candy, Layla who are conveniently positioned at the top of the ramp to confuse everyone because they didn't even interfere in the match so why the hell are they out there and why is there no payoff at "No Mercy" for this angle? Regal is the 2008 King of the Ring, but what does that mean? He promised to take the WWE by storm with his newfound power as "King", yet he just sits there in an oversized armchair and watches his rivals gain momentum heading into some unforeseen conclusion to an angle that has already gone on way too long.
On the bright (or dark) side of things is Kane.
Yes, Kane.
This guy is great.
You see, anyone who wants to know how to properly build a monster should take a look at what Kane is doing right now. Not tomorrow, not ten years ago, right now. Kane has squashed opponents of all sizes including Rey Mysterio and Kofi Kingston. Now he gets to be in what can only be described as a buffet of destruction in an 8-man tag team match. Despite being partnered with the World Tag Team Champions, "Priceless": Cody Rhodes and Ted DiBiase Jr., and their friendly neighborhood Samoan, Muna, Kane dominates this match from beginning to end.
The match is not without credit as the opposing team of Rey Mysterio, Evan Bourne, Kofi Kingston, and C.M. Punk put on an excellent showing. Evan Bourne is a huge reason to tune in to ECW on SciFi, and he proves it here with spot after spot of some of the most exciting action in YEARS. That's right, YEARS. That includes Rey Mysterio and Jeff Hardy. This young man is, if you'll pardon the pun, TOTAL NONSTOP ACTION. Kofi Kingston is another rapidly rising star that possesses a fluidity in the ring I've not seen in WWE in a long time. Great show by the youth in this match, and arguably, the most exciting of the night as the face team pulls off spot after spot to both begin and close the match.
There are a couple of downsides to this match. The first is that C.M. Punk is back down to mid-card status. That's disappointing as it's clear he's someone the fans WANT to get behind again. Despite mentions of retribution against Randy Orton, "Priceless", and Muna for costing him his World Heavyweight Championship at Unforgiven, Punk remains here where he spent most of the match getting worked over by those very men. That is the other downside. The methodical dissection of Punk went on way too long. Every member of the heel team got to work over Punk's leg at least once, which took up much of the middle segment of the match. The only part that drew heat was when Kane knocked Mysterio off the apron just as Punk looked like he was about to make a tag to escape a grip that had already held him much too long. Nevertheless, a terrific showing by Kane as he catches Kofi Kingston in the air and chokeslams him with authority to get the win. Kane has a lot of momentum riding on him now. I love that they allow the other wrestlers to be afraid even to talk to him backstage. That does a lot when it's not ridiculous.
The problem with most monsters, such as The "Great" Khali, is that they spend most of their time beating up guys a fraction of their size. Kane has beat up everyone from 190 lb. Rey Mysterio to 225 lb. Kofi Kingston, to C.M. Punk. Granted these men are all smaller than "The Big Red Machine", but not so small that we can't imagine one of them picking up a victory. This gives so much credit to Kane's character, and he is one of the few monsters besides Umaga who seem to have a very real power in the ring. I just hope the match at No Mercy doesn't blow it all to pieces.
The entire segment with Adamle was ridiculous. Orton's interruption was pointless. JBL's interruption was almost insufferable. Batista saved us all by spearing JBL, which felt a bit too de ja vu, but then spoiled it again by picking up the microphone. He walked away with that stupid grin of his. Damnit, get angry, Batista! No one wants to see a laughing contest as you beat your opponent senseless!
I'm glad to see development in the Women's division. I know Kelly Kelly is no Trish Stratus, but all these women have grown tremendously since their debut. Candice has worked especially hard to become one of the better competitors in her division, and I think she has set a great example for those who want to follow her. Beth Phoenix has made a great Women's Champion, holding the title with true dignity. Candice sends a mixed, but overall positive message. She is still eye candy, but it's clear she is no Barbie doll. She's no Awesome Kong or Lita, but she is as close to a "women's wrestler" as we'll probably see for some time.
In any case, "The Glamazon" picked up the win with help from tag team partner Jillian Hall against Kelly Kelly and Candice Michelle. Great finish by Beth Phoenix to contort herself back to her feet from a roll up while holding Kelly in a "chicken-wing" slam position. That looked truly devastating, you could hear the crowd "oh" at the impact. I look forward to seeing her defend her title Sunday against Candice. I know they will put together a good match.
The problem with Women's matches, more often than not, is their placement on the card moreso than the talent involved. The crowd began to chant "we want puppies" a third of the way in, and that had a lot to do with how the program was structured. Lita makes a terrific point of this in her book in which she talks about her first Wrestlemania (Wrestlemania X8) in which her triple threat match against Trish Stratus and Jaqueline was received with dead silence. Not because it was awful (anyone who watches the match can appreciate it), but because it was placed directly after the epic confrontation between Hulk Hogan and The Rock.
The same holds true here. You cannot expect a good reaction from impatient fans living in an ADD culture when you place the match between an all-star brawl and your main event. The crowd gets bored very quickly and I often wonder of the effect this has on the participants as far as their morale is concerned. No wonder the turnover rate for divas has skyrocketed in recent years: they're rarely given a true chance to shine.
I know I've been complaining about Batista's smile all night, but I couldn't help but laugh at the "Great Charli". This was one of the funnier segments I've seen in a while, and it even turned into a pretty entertaining, albeit short, bout. The followup by having The Great Khali confront Haas was classic, as it was clear to everyone Khali was struggling to keep from laughing along with the rest of us. This is a great example of how comedy SHOULD be used in wrestling. We got a descent match out of it, and few words needed to be spoken. Very simple, very funny. Very entertaining.
I can understand it is hard to get fans to watch new faces if they don't know anything about them. I understand that ECW is sort of a "training grounds" for future RAW and Smackdown! stars. But has it really come to this? Rather than airing some sort of promotional video, rather than educating the fans or preparing them for the arrival of a new star, the only way WWE can think to get a young man over is to have him shake hands with EVERYONE backstage?
This is a terrible concept. Whoever thought of this should be shot. I don't care if it WAS Vince McMahon. Boom. Dead.
The biggest issue with getting this talent over is the lack of territories. In the old days you got your stars from rival territories. These stars came with baggage, came with a legacy. You could talk about where they'd been, what they'd done. You may even have been lucky enough to have seen a match or two. Nowadays, WWE must fabricate resume's so that people will watch. I understand that is a difficult task, but if you've got a room full of writers at your command, it shouldn't be THAT difficult. I guarantee you this young man will be back in FCW by the end of 2008, not for his lack of talent, but for his lack of anything to work with.
Finally there is the main event: World Heavyweight Champion Chris Jericho and Lance Cade vs. "The Heartbreak Kid' Shawn Michaels and a partner of his choosing.
I guess I should've known who would be picked. I guess I should've seen it coming a mile away. But I try to think "outside the box". I tried to be optimistic.
This was a great opportunity to get some other young man in the action. This was a great chance to give someone a push closer to main event status. What could be more impressive than being hand-picked by HBK himself? I thought maybe Matt Hardy in anticipation for the "Night of Champions" this Friday on Smackdown! I thought maybe someone new, someone old, someone that would be pulled out of thin air and surprise everyone in the world.
Instead WWE took the safe route and reunited D-Generation X.
Now, I'm not complaining. I love DX. Even when they reunited in 2006 to shamelessly plug their merchandise on live TV, I felt like a little kid eating up some candy I hadn't tasted in a long time. But DX got stale after a while. The vignettes got less funny and more predictable. The match structre got reptitive.
Tonight I thought would be different. Tonight the roles would be reversed. You see, tonight they had to put Shawn over. Typical DX match structure dictates that Shawn will start the match strong, get beaten down, and tag in Triple H to save the day. "The Game" would burst in and squash everyone, leaving HBK just enough time to land a superkick so Trips can hit the Pedigree for the win. Insert some crotch chops in the mix, let it cool for 15 minutes, and you have yourself a good old-fashioned D-Generation X tag team match. Seriously. It doesn't matter who the opponents are. The Spirit Squad? Crotch. Kick. Game. The McMahons? Crotch. Kick. Game. Chris Jericho and Lance Cade? Crotch. Kick. You know.
Anyway, I really thought this would be different because they wouldn't let the 1 Contender for the World Heavyweight Championship limp around the ring like a wounded animal. That would make Shawn look weak and helpless and Triple H would have to come and save the day again, making it look like Shawn was nothing without his companion who, by the way, is WWE Champion.
The match starts with Shawn looking strong. Triple gets his shots in, too. DX is rolling. Triple H lets Y2J get a couple of shots in, but overall pummels the champion. This looks terrible for both RAW and for Jericho. If Y2J is the top of RAW's ladder, then how come this guy from Smackdown! can walk all over him while HBK struggles to beat him?
Then HBK comes in and starts selling like a preacher. He gets battered and busted by Jericho and Cade until he's crawling toward "The Game". Upon receiving the tag, the "Cerebrial Assassin" proceeds to anihilate anything that moves: the same guys that just beat the hell out of RAW's 1 Contender. What was Shawn struggling for anyway? These guys are obviously pushovers! Just look at the way Smackdown!'s champion mows them over.
Finally, the match ends in DQ because clean finishes are SO 1995. DX wins, of course as Jericho and Cade double-team...you guessed it: the 1 Contender, Shawn Michaels! Again, Trippy has to come in, this time with his friend, Sledge, to save Shawn's rear. Finally Shawn hits Cade with that Superkick we've heard so much about and that leads to the Pedigree that kills hopes and dreams.
Cade is prone. HBK is tired. Triple H is angry. He's always angry. I wonder what he's like at birthday parties? Probably angry when it's not his birthday.
Anyway, the "King of Kings" (one of the few Biblical references in wrestling that managed to escape worldwide controversy) grabs a ladder and sets it up for Shawn...in the corner.
That's right. Shawn can't get up the ladder without climbing the trunbuckle. He then gives a mild DX chop to Jericho (because the world would hate to see a REAL Christian thrust his pelvis...) and splashes onto Cade. HBK then writhes in pain either from his ribs or his arm. Either way, as we go off the air, it's "The Game" that's standing there, staring down Jericho while Y2J's opponent for Sunday leans on the ropes for support as he recuperates from his mighty feat of gravity-defying proportions.
Way to put over your 1 Contender, guys. Way to go.
Now I remember why I liked having Triple H on Smackdown!
The thing is, we all know HBK is gonna lose on Sunday. The man is injured and can't possibly hold a championship in his condition. He'll get beat and take a few months off to recover. So there you go. Sorry, but there's the spoiler. Hey, you should thank me! I just saved you $39.95 ($49.95 if you've got HD)!
I guess I shouldn't be too hard on the product. After all, this is only slightly better than what we were watching a few weeks ago when RAW drew a 2.6 rating.
That's right. 2.6.
You'd think that would be the red flag that sent up alarms all over Connecticut. You'd think that would be the match that lit the fire under Titan Tower. You'd think Vince would listen to what the fans want and actually start GIVING it to them before they turn his product off completely.
Of course, if you're thinking that, you're clearly out of touch with WWE.
The show opened with Batista going one on one with Santino Marella. There is no denying Marella's charisma, so I wonder why he is being mowed down by the rather stiff and stale "Animal". I actually look forward to seeing the Honk-a-meter every week! I'm not sure if that's a comment on WWE's lack of creativity, or a testament to Santino's entertainment value, but either way, it gets me to tune in.
One thing I am tired of is Batista's smile. Even as Santino clearly insults "The Animal"'s brain power, Dave stands in the ring, grinning at the man he is about to squash. The man is cutting a promo and Batista is laughing at him. One thing that I agree wholeheartedly on is something Mick Foley wrote: you should ALWAYS react to your opponent's promos against you. If you laugh at the promo, you laugh at the man, which makes it harder for that man to sell tickets. I know Santino is there for comic relief, but it makes Dave look stupid, too. "Look at him laughing at himself! Ha, ha! What an idiot!" Then he goes and squashes Marella (who is STILL Intercontinental Champion) and all of a sudden we're supposed to believe Dave is some kind of bad-ass who takes pleasure in beating people up. He's not angry. He just gets off on it. Wow. That will sell tickets.
The Miz beat JTG in a one-on-one match. This was pretty entertaining. Again, a good sign of pumping fresh blood into the company. Miz has come a long way, and I will admit that he is more entertaining than I could ever have given him credit for when he started over on Smackdown! with his "Red Rooster" haircut and terrible "Reality Check" gimmick (though his finisher still bears that name...) The only flaw in this match was the finish. Morrison distracts JTG, only to be tripped up by Shad on the ring apron. Despite the clean-up by Shad, JTG REMAINS distracted long enough for Miz to pick up the win. What is the point of having your partner there breaking up distractions if you're going to be distracted anyway? Silly finish altogether, though the match was a fairly entertaining bout.
I'm not sure what WWE expects us to think of Jamie Noble. Wrestling fans don't tune in so they can root for the heartbroken redneck who can't nab the girl that's WAY out of his league. They ARE the heartbroken rednecks who can't nab the girl because she's WAY out of their league. That's what makes them angry. That's what makes them watch wrestling! They don't want to play the violin, they want vengeance, damnit! Cold, hard, remorseless vengeance. Having Jamie job to the couple of the week is not going to win him any fans or cause people to tune in. If he turned out to be some "love crusader", defeating his opponents in the name of "true love", that might help. Sure it'd be just as terrible, but it might help him get over.
Anyway, Jamie proves that he can at least have lady friends in a very platonic sense because he manages to get the lovely and talented Mickie James as his tag team partner against Paul and Katie Lea Burchill. This was a descent intergender match (which means the guys CAN wrestle the girls and vice versa). Jamie picks up a nice win that he can throw in the face of William Regal and his eye candy, Layla who are conveniently positioned at the top of the ramp to confuse everyone because they didn't even interfere in the match so why the hell are they out there and why is there no payoff at "No Mercy" for this angle? Regal is the 2008 King of the Ring, but what does that mean? He promised to take the WWE by storm with his newfound power as "King", yet he just sits there in an oversized armchair and watches his rivals gain momentum heading into some unforeseen conclusion to an angle that has already gone on way too long.
On the bright (or dark) side of things is Kane.
Yes, Kane.
This guy is great.
You see, anyone who wants to know how to properly build a monster should take a look at what Kane is doing right now. Not tomorrow, not ten years ago, right now. Kane has squashed opponents of all sizes including Rey Mysterio and Kofi Kingston. Now he gets to be in what can only be described as a buffet of destruction in an 8-man tag team match. Despite being partnered with the World Tag Team Champions, "Priceless": Cody Rhodes and Ted DiBiase Jr., and their friendly neighborhood Samoan, Muna, Kane dominates this match from beginning to end.
The match is not without credit as the opposing team of Rey Mysterio, Evan Bourne, Kofi Kingston, and C.M. Punk put on an excellent showing. Evan Bourne is a huge reason to tune in to ECW on SciFi, and he proves it here with spot after spot of some of the most exciting action in YEARS. That's right, YEARS. That includes Rey Mysterio and Jeff Hardy. This young man is, if you'll pardon the pun, TOTAL NONSTOP ACTION. Kofi Kingston is another rapidly rising star that possesses a fluidity in the ring I've not seen in WWE in a long time. Great show by the youth in this match, and arguably, the most exciting of the night as the face team pulls off spot after spot to both begin and close the match.
There are a couple of downsides to this match. The first is that C.M. Punk is back down to mid-card status. That's disappointing as it's clear he's someone the fans WANT to get behind again. Despite mentions of retribution against Randy Orton, "Priceless", and Muna for costing him his World Heavyweight Championship at Unforgiven, Punk remains here where he spent most of the match getting worked over by those very men. That is the other downside. The methodical dissection of Punk went on way too long. Every member of the heel team got to work over Punk's leg at least once, which took up much of the middle segment of the match. The only part that drew heat was when Kane knocked Mysterio off the apron just as Punk looked like he was about to make a tag to escape a grip that had already held him much too long. Nevertheless, a terrific showing by Kane as he catches Kofi Kingston in the air and chokeslams him with authority to get the win. Kane has a lot of momentum riding on him now. I love that they allow the other wrestlers to be afraid even to talk to him backstage. That does a lot when it's not ridiculous.
The problem with most monsters, such as The "Great" Khali, is that they spend most of their time beating up guys a fraction of their size. Kane has beat up everyone from 190 lb. Rey Mysterio to 225 lb. Kofi Kingston, to C.M. Punk. Granted these men are all smaller than "The Big Red Machine", but not so small that we can't imagine one of them picking up a victory. This gives so much credit to Kane's character, and he is one of the few monsters besides Umaga who seem to have a very real power in the ring. I just hope the match at No Mercy doesn't blow it all to pieces.
The entire segment with Adamle was ridiculous. Orton's interruption was pointless. JBL's interruption was almost insufferable. Batista saved us all by spearing JBL, which felt a bit too de ja vu, but then spoiled it again by picking up the microphone. He walked away with that stupid grin of his. Damnit, get angry, Batista! No one wants to see a laughing contest as you beat your opponent senseless!
I'm glad to see development in the Women's division. I know Kelly Kelly is no Trish Stratus, but all these women have grown tremendously since their debut. Candice has worked especially hard to become one of the better competitors in her division, and I think she has set a great example for those who want to follow her. Beth Phoenix has made a great Women's Champion, holding the title with true dignity. Candice sends a mixed, but overall positive message. She is still eye candy, but it's clear she is no Barbie doll. She's no Awesome Kong or Lita, but she is as close to a "women's wrestler" as we'll probably see for some time.
In any case, "The Glamazon" picked up the win with help from tag team partner Jillian Hall against Kelly Kelly and Candice Michelle. Great finish by Beth Phoenix to contort herself back to her feet from a roll up while holding Kelly in a "chicken-wing" slam position. That looked truly devastating, you could hear the crowd "oh" at the impact. I look forward to seeing her defend her title Sunday against Candice. I know they will put together a good match.
The problem with Women's matches, more often than not, is their placement on the card moreso than the talent involved. The crowd began to chant "we want puppies" a third of the way in, and that had a lot to do with how the program was structured. Lita makes a terrific point of this in her book in which she talks about her first Wrestlemania (Wrestlemania X8) in which her triple threat match against Trish Stratus and Jaqueline was received with dead silence. Not because it was awful (anyone who watches the match can appreciate it), but because it was placed directly after the epic confrontation between Hulk Hogan and The Rock.
The same holds true here. You cannot expect a good reaction from impatient fans living in an ADD culture when you place the match between an all-star brawl and your main event. The crowd gets bored very quickly and I often wonder of the effect this has on the participants as far as their morale is concerned. No wonder the turnover rate for divas has skyrocketed in recent years: they're rarely given a true chance to shine.
I know I've been complaining about Batista's smile all night, but I couldn't help but laugh at the "Great Charli". This was one of the funnier segments I've seen in a while, and it even turned into a pretty entertaining, albeit short, bout. The followup by having The Great Khali confront Haas was classic, as it was clear to everyone Khali was struggling to keep from laughing along with the rest of us. This is a great example of how comedy SHOULD be used in wrestling. We got a descent match out of it, and few words needed to be spoken. Very simple, very funny. Very entertaining.
I can understand it is hard to get fans to watch new faces if they don't know anything about them. I understand that ECW is sort of a "training grounds" for future RAW and Smackdown! stars. But has it really come to this? Rather than airing some sort of promotional video, rather than educating the fans or preparing them for the arrival of a new star, the only way WWE can think to get a young man over is to have him shake hands with EVERYONE backstage?
This is a terrible concept. Whoever thought of this should be shot. I don't care if it WAS Vince McMahon. Boom. Dead.
The biggest issue with getting this talent over is the lack of territories. In the old days you got your stars from rival territories. These stars came with baggage, came with a legacy. You could talk about where they'd been, what they'd done. You may even have been lucky enough to have seen a match or two. Nowadays, WWE must fabricate resume's so that people will watch. I understand that is a difficult task, but if you've got a room full of writers at your command, it shouldn't be THAT difficult. I guarantee you this young man will be back in FCW by the end of 2008, not for his lack of talent, but for his lack of anything to work with.
Finally there is the main event: World Heavyweight Champion Chris Jericho and Lance Cade vs. "The Heartbreak Kid' Shawn Michaels and a partner of his choosing.
I guess I should've known who would be picked. I guess I should've seen it coming a mile away. But I try to think "outside the box". I tried to be optimistic.
This was a great opportunity to get some other young man in the action. This was a great chance to give someone a push closer to main event status. What could be more impressive than being hand-picked by HBK himself? I thought maybe Matt Hardy in anticipation for the "Night of Champions" this Friday on Smackdown! I thought maybe someone new, someone old, someone that would be pulled out of thin air and surprise everyone in the world.
Instead WWE took the safe route and reunited D-Generation X.
Now, I'm not complaining. I love DX. Even when they reunited in 2006 to shamelessly plug their merchandise on live TV, I felt like a little kid eating up some candy I hadn't tasted in a long time. But DX got stale after a while. The vignettes got less funny and more predictable. The match structre got reptitive.
Tonight I thought would be different. Tonight the roles would be reversed. You see, tonight they had to put Shawn over. Typical DX match structure dictates that Shawn will start the match strong, get beaten down, and tag in Triple H to save the day. "The Game" would burst in and squash everyone, leaving HBK just enough time to land a superkick so Trips can hit the Pedigree for the win. Insert some crotch chops in the mix, let it cool for 15 minutes, and you have yourself a good old-fashioned D-Generation X tag team match. Seriously. It doesn't matter who the opponents are. The Spirit Squad? Crotch. Kick. Game. The McMahons? Crotch. Kick. Game. Chris Jericho and Lance Cade? Crotch. Kick. You know.
Anyway, I really thought this would be different because they wouldn't let the 1 Contender for the World Heavyweight Championship limp around the ring like a wounded animal. That would make Shawn look weak and helpless and Triple H would have to come and save the day again, making it look like Shawn was nothing without his companion who, by the way, is WWE Champion.
The match starts with Shawn looking strong. Triple gets his shots in, too. DX is rolling. Triple H lets Y2J get a couple of shots in, but overall pummels the champion. This looks terrible for both RAW and for Jericho. If Y2J is the top of RAW's ladder, then how come this guy from Smackdown! can walk all over him while HBK struggles to beat him?
Then HBK comes in and starts selling like a preacher. He gets battered and busted by Jericho and Cade until he's crawling toward "The Game". Upon receiving the tag, the "Cerebrial Assassin" proceeds to anihilate anything that moves: the same guys that just beat the hell out of RAW's 1 Contender. What was Shawn struggling for anyway? These guys are obviously pushovers! Just look at the way Smackdown!'s champion mows them over.
Finally, the match ends in DQ because clean finishes are SO 1995. DX wins, of course as Jericho and Cade double-team...you guessed it: the 1 Contender, Shawn Michaels! Again, Trippy has to come in, this time with his friend, Sledge, to save Shawn's rear. Finally Shawn hits Cade with that Superkick we've heard so much about and that leads to the Pedigree that kills hopes and dreams.
Cade is prone. HBK is tired. Triple H is angry. He's always angry. I wonder what he's like at birthday parties? Probably angry when it's not his birthday.
Anyway, the "King of Kings" (one of the few Biblical references in wrestling that managed to escape worldwide controversy) grabs a ladder and sets it up for Shawn...in the corner.
That's right. Shawn can't get up the ladder without climbing the trunbuckle. He then gives a mild DX chop to Jericho (because the world would hate to see a REAL Christian thrust his pelvis...) and splashes onto Cade. HBK then writhes in pain either from his ribs or his arm. Either way, as we go off the air, it's "The Game" that's standing there, staring down Jericho while Y2J's opponent for Sunday leans on the ropes for support as he recuperates from his mighty feat of gravity-defying proportions.
Way to put over your 1 Contender, guys. Way to go.
Now I remember why I liked having Triple H on Smackdown!
The thing is, we all know HBK is gonna lose on Sunday. The man is injured and can't possibly hold a championship in his condition. He'll get beat and take a few months off to recover. So there you go. Sorry, but there's the spoiler. Hey, you should thank me! I just saved you $39.95 ($49.95 if you've got HD)!
I guess I shouldn't be too hard on the product. After all, this is only slightly better than what we were watching a few weeks ago when RAW drew a 2.6 rating.
That's right. 2.6.
You'd think that would be the red flag that sent up alarms all over Connecticut. You'd think that would be the match that lit the fire under Titan Tower. You'd think Vince would listen to what the fans want and actually start GIVING it to them before they turn his product off completely.
Of course, if you're thinking that, you're clearly out of touch with WWE.
Monday, September 8, 2008
Unforgiven 2008
I'll make this short. I don't have a whole lot of time. I didn't see all of Unforgiven 2008. I came in for the closing matches of the WWE Championship scramble and took it from there. I later went back and watched specifically the Shawn Michaels vs. Chris Jericho bout. Below are some quick thoughts I sent in to Bill Apter of http://www.1wrestling.com after the show. You can also access them through the site here.
From Vincent Conroy
MATCH OF THE YEAR: Y2J vs. HBK
I don't want to waste time with the other matches. This one was by far the best of the night. There were parts that were disturbing to watch and at times I had to keep reminding myself this whole angle was a work. Any creative mind in any form of wrestling should pay close attention on how to properly build a feud. Any wrestler should pay attention to how to tell a story in the ring. These two are magic together.
As I said, there were parts that were almost disturbing. I have seen a lot of original ECW stuff (the best of the hardcore matches) and this still sent chills down my spine. It wasn't particularly bloody (though plenty was shed…), it was moreso the psychology behind it: the fact that the "pure and holy" Shawn Michaels was consciously and willingly inflicting this kind of pain on Chris Jericho. HBK was favoring his left arm the whole time (Shawn is a southpaw…) but still managed to pull of yet another showstopping performance.
As for Y2J, I doubt he had to work hard to sell anything as every blow seemed more real than the last. From being suplexed on the ramp (a move that seemed to open his arm up) to being put through the announce table, to being whipped with Shawn's belt (even in the face…) this was by far the worst beating I've ever seen Jericho or any wrestler take. Jericho was blatantly whimpering in pain through the middle of the match and I wonder if the finish was changed because of the wounds he has sustained. Before tackling Jericho toward the end of the match you could see Shawn crawl up behind him and, wrapping Jericho's arm around his own throat, mouth the words "Are you okay?" To the viewer it looked like HBK was teasing Jericho, because HBK the character could care less. Deep down, though, we could see that Shawn truly was concerned for Jericho's health, as are many people at this point.
Both men told a great story. Jericho's evil expression makes your blood run cold and seeing babyface Michaels become "possessed" to the point of being a mirror for Jericho's hatred was just disturbing. Shawn was openly crying after putting Jericho through the announce table and after the match was over. He was shaking all over as Jericho writhed in what I have to believe to be very real pain. Jerry "The King" Lawler said it best when he claimed Shawn Michaels had been "possessed by the devil", because he certainly wasn't the Shawn Michaels we are used to seeing.
The average hardcore match utilizes more weapons and sheds more blood, but deep down you remember that both men signed to do it, and at least one of them is enjoying themselves. We know that HBK and Y2J signed up for this, but to think that either man is having a pleasant evening as a result is unfathomable. This is what wrestling is all about: storytelling. This is a great story that will go down as one of the greatest feuds of all time.
OTHER THOUGHTS:
Randy Orton needs to form a stable with Priceless (who finally need to call themselves "Priceless" and start selling their own T-shirts…)
Matt Hardy as ECW Champion is another reason to tune in on Tuesday nights. A very smart move.
The Divas Title was up for grabs, but no one cared because a better angle would've been Candice Michelle vs. Beth Phoenix for the Women's Championship. There are too many redundant titles running around in WWE.
Triple H retaining the WWE Title is okay considering the circumstances, but now it's time to put the strap on Jeff Hardy, who the fans CLEARLY want to see win. Nice tease by WWE, but only if it actually gets Jeff the title in the near future.
Nice to see actual plot development on a PPV, though the segment with 'Taker and Big Show ran a bit long. Why do beat-downs take so long these days?
WWE needs to increase the number of matches per PPV and shorten the length of each match. The title scrambles were deliberately 20 minutes to take up air time (that's 1/3 of the PPV right there…) but were struggling to fill it with solid action. The Divas Title match suffered from the same issue. Remember when we used to get 10 matches per PPV and each match only had to be about 15 minutes long (title matches were always longer?) That's what they need to go back to. What's the point in having 9 titles in your company if only 5 get defended regularly? No IC, Women's, WWE Tag, or United States title matches (Shelton Benjamin was in the WWE title scramble). With PPV's now $49.99 (for HD) I want more bang for my buck.
All in all I give the show a 7/10, mostly for the HBK/Y2J classic and also for finally giving Matt Hardy a world championship. Let's see if they can do the same for Jeff.
Another, late-breaking thought (though it's pretty obvious by now) is having all three title matches under the same stipulation. I thought the crowd was dead because the action was lame, but there was nothing wrong with the wrestling. It was the fact that they'd already endured two of these scrambles and now they were sitting through a third one. Rather than a develop a real feud between champion and challenger, it's much easier for creative to sit back and throw the "tournament" angle out there under a different name.
Awesome.
They did the same thing a little while back with the Elimination Chamber and what a huge flop that was. Chamber mathces used to be special but now I feel saturated with pointless, arbitrary gimmick matches and long for a good, deep-running feud. Is that really too much to ask?
I guess so.
From Vincent Conroy
MATCH OF THE YEAR: Y2J vs. HBK
I don't want to waste time with the other matches. This one was by far the best of the night. There were parts that were disturbing to watch and at times I had to keep reminding myself this whole angle was a work. Any creative mind in any form of wrestling should pay close attention on how to properly build a feud. Any wrestler should pay attention to how to tell a story in the ring. These two are magic together.
As I said, there were parts that were almost disturbing. I have seen a lot of original ECW stuff (the best of the hardcore matches) and this still sent chills down my spine. It wasn't particularly bloody (though plenty was shed…), it was moreso the psychology behind it: the fact that the "pure and holy" Shawn Michaels was consciously and willingly inflicting this kind of pain on Chris Jericho. HBK was favoring his left arm the whole time (Shawn is a southpaw…) but still managed to pull of yet another showstopping performance.
As for Y2J, I doubt he had to work hard to sell anything as every blow seemed more real than the last. From being suplexed on the ramp (a move that seemed to open his arm up) to being put through the announce table, to being whipped with Shawn's belt (even in the face…) this was by far the worst beating I've ever seen Jericho or any wrestler take. Jericho was blatantly whimpering in pain through the middle of the match and I wonder if the finish was changed because of the wounds he has sustained. Before tackling Jericho toward the end of the match you could see Shawn crawl up behind him and, wrapping Jericho's arm around his own throat, mouth the words "Are you okay?" To the viewer it looked like HBK was teasing Jericho, because HBK the character could care less. Deep down, though, we could see that Shawn truly was concerned for Jericho's health, as are many people at this point.
Both men told a great story. Jericho's evil expression makes your blood run cold and seeing babyface Michaels become "possessed" to the point of being a mirror for Jericho's hatred was just disturbing. Shawn was openly crying after putting Jericho through the announce table and after the match was over. He was shaking all over as Jericho writhed in what I have to believe to be very real pain. Jerry "The King" Lawler said it best when he claimed Shawn Michaels had been "possessed by the devil", because he certainly wasn't the Shawn Michaels we are used to seeing.
The average hardcore match utilizes more weapons and sheds more blood, but deep down you remember that both men signed to do it, and at least one of them is enjoying themselves. We know that HBK and Y2J signed up for this, but to think that either man is having a pleasant evening as a result is unfathomable. This is what wrestling is all about: storytelling. This is a great story that will go down as one of the greatest feuds of all time.
OTHER THOUGHTS:
Randy Orton needs to form a stable with Priceless (who finally need to call themselves "Priceless" and start selling their own T-shirts…)
Matt Hardy as ECW Champion is another reason to tune in on Tuesday nights. A very smart move.
The Divas Title was up for grabs, but no one cared because a better angle would've been Candice Michelle vs. Beth Phoenix for the Women's Championship. There are too many redundant titles running around in WWE.
Triple H retaining the WWE Title is okay considering the circumstances, but now it's time to put the strap on Jeff Hardy, who the fans CLEARLY want to see win. Nice tease by WWE, but only if it actually gets Jeff the title in the near future.
Nice to see actual plot development on a PPV, though the segment with 'Taker and Big Show ran a bit long. Why do beat-downs take so long these days?
WWE needs to increase the number of matches per PPV and shorten the length of each match. The title scrambles were deliberately 20 minutes to take up air time (that's 1/3 of the PPV right there…) but were struggling to fill it with solid action. The Divas Title match suffered from the same issue. Remember when we used to get 10 matches per PPV and each match only had to be about 15 minutes long (title matches were always longer?) That's what they need to go back to. What's the point in having 9 titles in your company if only 5 get defended regularly? No IC, Women's, WWE Tag, or United States title matches (Shelton Benjamin was in the WWE title scramble). With PPV's now $49.99 (for HD) I want more bang for my buck.
All in all I give the show a 7/10, mostly for the HBK/Y2J classic and also for finally giving Matt Hardy a world championship. Let's see if they can do the same for Jeff.
Another, late-breaking thought (though it's pretty obvious by now) is having all three title matches under the same stipulation. I thought the crowd was dead because the action was lame, but there was nothing wrong with the wrestling. It was the fact that they'd already endured two of these scrambles and now they were sitting through a third one. Rather than a develop a real feud between champion and challenger, it's much easier for creative to sit back and throw the "tournament" angle out there under a different name.
Awesome.
They did the same thing a little while back with the Elimination Chamber and what a huge flop that was. Chamber mathces used to be special but now I feel saturated with pointless, arbitrary gimmick matches and long for a good, deep-running feud. Is that really too much to ask?
I guess so.
Tuesday, June 24, 2008
WWE Draft 2008
Raw rolled out a three-hour special last Monday to present it's 2008 Draft of all the stars from Raw, Smackdown, and ECW.
Mr. McMahon also continued his Million Dollar Mania giveaway as he bestowed his money upon several lucky viewers.
Since most of the show remained unchanged, I will concentrate mainly on the picks themselves.
For those who didn't get to see the show the formula was as such: all the matches for the night were interpromotional bouts (meaning each brand faced opponents from a different brand) with the winner(s) giving their brand the next draft pick, meaning that whichever Superstar was randomly selected would be drafted to the brand that won the match.
This was a nice formula that put together some intriguing matchups and also gave the matches themselves some real consequences. The other nice thing about this is that for every draft pick, there MUST be a match, and therefore, the quantity of matches for the night was increased from the average of four to about ten. Granted, this was with an extra hour, but that still boils down to three or four matches an HOUR rather than four or five matches over two hours.
So let's take these matches (and draft picks) in order, shall we?
RAW VS. SMACKDOWN
WWE Champion Triple H vs. "The World's Strongest Man" Mark Henry
I thought this was a very intriguing matchup, though I wondered just how much Triple H would give to make Henry look good. It was a descent match, but of course, no one expected Henry to win. The crowd was firmly behind Triple H the whole time, and in the end, despite Henry's VERY impressive counter to the Pedigree (he actually picked The Game up to reverse it...) Triple gets the win and thus secures the first draft pick for Raw.
DRAFT PICK 1: Rey Mysterio is drafted to Monday Night Raw
I think this is a good choice, though it would not have been my first. Rey has been working very hard over at Smackdown and his popularity continues to rise with each year, especially following his reign as World Champion. He definitely deserves a spot on the flagship broadcast, but I wonder how far he will get with so many stars cluttering up the main event.
RAW VS. SMACKDOWN
TAG TEAM MATCH
Finlay & Hornswoggle vs. Carlito & Santino Marella
Finlay and Hornswoggle pull out the win here in a fun little match. Santino's charisma and ridiculous temper made this more entertaining than it should've been. It was nice to see Smackdown go over Raw for a change, lending some credibility to a struggling brand. So Smackdown gets the next draft pick.
DRAFT PICK 2: Jeff Hardy is drafted to Friday Night Smackdown
I am infuriated by this decision.
Jeff Hardy has worked so hard on Raw, and has only grown more popular despite being suspended for his Wellness Program violation. Even after missing Wrestlemania 24 due to this suspension, he comes back with more crowd support than ever, and it's clear they want to see him in the main event vying for the top title. Then WWE buries him in a 1 Contender's match with John Cena, and suddenly his hope of being an even bigger star in this business is dashed.
My original theory was that he was drafted to Smackdown because they knew if he stayed on Raw they would eventually have to put him over Triple H, which would be blasphemy at this point, so they threw him onto the B-show where he would be able to thrive without any Triple H-sized roadblocks. Justify it however you will, Hardy belongs on Raw.
RAW VS. ECW
TAG TEAM MATCH
World Tag Team Champions Bob Holly & Cody Rhodes vs. Bam Neeley and Chavo Guerrero
At last ECW gets a chance to claim some new stars of it's own.
But they won't. They're up against guys from Raw. The Tag Champs, no less.
Never mind then.
ECW gets buried, of course, giving Raw it's second draft pick.
DRAFT PICK 3: C.M. Punk is drafted to Monday Night Raw
This was pretty much a given, but it's nice to see WWE doing something smart. Punk has been a great hand on ECW, and though his reign as Champion on that brand never quite brought him the stardom it should have, there is little more he can accomplish there. He belongs on Raw where his popularity can continue to rise. Being Mr. Money-in-the-Bank for 2008, it's clear he will be slotted against the Champion at some point, but I would rather see him work up to it, maybe feuding with Chris Jericho for the Intercontinental Championship first. That would be a great program with some terrific wrestling for fans to enjoy. In any case, Punk is where he should've been a long time ago: he's now on the A-show of WWE.
ECW VS. SMACKDOWN
TAG TEAM MATCH
WWE Tag Team Champions The Miz & John Morrison vs. The Hardys
I'm not exactly sure what Vickie Guerrero's purpose here was. Usually she comes out to announce something that will piss the fans off, but today she actually grants them a gift. She told the WWE Tag Champs that it was originally scheduled to be Miz & Morrison vs. Hawkins & Ryder, but that she has changed that and selected new opponents. Matt Hardy's music hits, and the crowd goes crazy, and when Jeff emerges from behind the TitanTron, the roof comes off.
Anyway, I guess they figured since the brothers are on the same brand now (Jeff having been drafted to Smackdown two matches earlier) they can reform their infamous tag team relationship. Unfortunately it's to no avail. A good tag match sees the WWE Tag Team Champions go over the brothers of extreme, granting ECW it's first draft pick of the night.
DRAFT PICK 4: Matt Hardy is drafted to ECW
I'm not exactly sure what the big deal is here. In the first place, Smackdown and ECW share talent anyway, so drafting men between the two shows doesn't seem to make a whole lot of sense.
What this DOES establish is that champions drafted to other brands also bring their titles with them. So the United States Championship is now property of ECW. I'm still not sure what the big deal is. I suspect Smackdown wrestlers will still be able to compete for the title thanks to the sharing of talent.
This seems to be a direct contradiction in the philosophy behind Jeff Hardy's drafting to Smackdown. Whereas Jeff needed Smackdown to get out from under other stars' shadows (specifically Triple H), Matt was already flourishing on Smackdown and had gotten infinitely more popular thanks to the long-awaited defeated of his arch-rival, MVP for the United States Championship. Throwing Matt to ECW won't really change anything because the same stars appear on either show. The only place that really would've reshaped Matt's future is Raw, where of course, he would've suffered the same fate as his brother no matter how good he was.
RAW VS. SMACKDOWN-ANNOUNCERS ONLY DRAFTED
TAG TEAM MATCH
Women's Champion Mickie James & Melina vs. Victoria & Natalya
This match means that ONLY the announcers would be drafted between brands. The match itself was cut short when Melina was knocked off the ring apron and seriously sprained her ankle taking the fall. It is a genuine injury, as you could hear Mickie ask Melina if she was hurt, to wich the latter replied "Yes". The match fell apart as Mickie sought to attend to Melina rather than get back into the ring. You could hear Melina say "I'm sorry" several times to her tag team partner. Eventually Mickie was ambushed by Victoria and Natalya, resulting in, of all things, a double disqualification. While I'm sure the result was inentional, the match itself clearly fell apart. Melina, in tears, was carried from ringside by two men after the conclusion of the match.
As a result of the Double-DQ (I'm still not exactly sure what anyone did WRONG...a double countout may have been better suited here...) both brands were granted a draft pick.
DRAFT PICK 5: "Good Ol' J.R." Jim Ross is drafted to Friday Night Smackdown
DRAFT PICK 6: Michael Cole is drafted to Monday Night Raw
No one is happy with this arrangement. Jerry "The King" Lawler looked absolutely astounded, and J.R. was visibly upset as he took his place over at the Smackdown announce table. Meanwhile, Michael Cole reluctantly took his place next to "The King", who continued to look across the floor to his longtime partner as if waiting for someone to jump out and say, "Gotcha!"
This is the most ridiculous decision of the night.
Even Mick Foley later acknowledged that Jim Ross was "an institution" on Monday Night Raw.
So why the hell is he being drafted to Smackdown?
Michael Cole stated that while he was honored to be a part of Raw (a statement that did more harm to Smackdown than anything...) he felt awkward taking J.R.'s place.
This is a ludicrous decision that will eventually be reversed. While I don't think moving J.R. will impact anyone's ratings, fans will cry out at the sheer blasphemy of moving him to Smackdown. All due respect to Michael Cole (who certainly deserves a spot on Raw), his promotion should not have come at the expense of Raw's legendary annouce team being split up.
RAW VS. SMACKDOWN
John Cena vs. World Heavyweight Champion Edge
This is the "main event", but presented 2/3 of the way through the program. Vince announced this match prior to one of his giveaways.
It was certainly a very entertaining match that saw solid spots by both men. Eventually, John Cena picked up the win, giving Raw yet another draft pick.
DRAFT PICK 7: Batista is drafted to Monday Night Raw
Again, I'm not sure what good this does for Batista. He has become something of an institution himself over on Smackdown and done a great job of holding the main event picture together. Drafting him to Raw will only further confound their main event canvas. Still, it's a nice change of pace. It's been three years since Batista was a full-time member of the Raw roster, but what good is his arrival if he only seeks to run through everyone in the locker room?
SMACKDOWN VS. ECW
Montel Vontavious Porter vs. Tommy Deamer
By now, Tazz has made it very clear that he's frustrated by the fact that ECW has had only one draft pick the whole night. This is the seventh match of the night, and only the third featuring ECW. Meanwhile, Raw has had five mathces resulting in four draft picks. This is Smackdown's sixth match, and they have won themselves two draft picks. Tazz banks on Dreamer to win a second draft pick (and some respect) for ECW, but is sorely disappointed when MVP picks up the win and Smackdown's third draft pick.
DRAFT PICK 8: Umaga is drafted to Friday Night Smackdown
This is another smart move. Umaga is a real force in WWE, but has suffered a few too many losses on Raw. Putting him on Smackdown will help revamp his character and give him fresh opponents. Great decision here.
RAW VS. ECW
John "Bradshaw" Layfield vs. Kofi Kingston
Again, Tazz's frustration with his brand shines through in this match. Despite an excellent showing by Kofi Kingston, he is of course buried when JBL hits the Clothesline from Hell out of nowhere to pick up the win, giving Raw it's fifth draft pick.
DRAFT PICK 9: Kane is drafted to Monday Night Raw
This is in the same vein as the Matt Hardy draft. Kane was only recently drafted to ECW, and then only recently crowned with their Championship just three months ago. Assuming that he will drop the ECW World Championship (which until Sunday is property of Raw) at Night of Champions, Kane is already very familiar with most of the men in the Raw locker room. Kane is a good worker that was becoming a staple of ECW. Now all that will be for nothing as he is once again lost in the crowded Raw roster.
RAW VS. SMACKDOWN VS. ECW
15-MAN TRI-BRAND BATTLE ROYAL
(WINNING BRAND RECEIVES TWO DRAFT PICKS)
Team Raw: ECW World Champion Kane, WWE Champion Triple H, Batista, John Cena, and C.M. Punk
vs.
Team Smackdown: World Heavyweight Champion Edge, The Big Show, The Great Khali, Montel Vontavious Porter, and Jeff Hardy
vs.
Team ECW: WWE Tag Team Champions The Miz & John Morrison, United States Champion Matt Hardy, Chavo Guerrero, and Shelton Benjamin
So the rules are that whichever team wins gets two draft picks. This is, of course, Tazz's dream come true as ECW has a chance to play catch up to Raw and Smackdown. Smackdown's team is the most formidable with both Big Show and Khali there. ECW looked small by comparisson. Raw had the most star power, which was unfortunate to see so bluntly presented.
The match had some interesting moments; particularly when the Hardys stared each other down in the middle of the ring before Jeff began to beat on his brother. Khali was eliminated almost instantly by all the members of Raw and ECW. Big Show then proceeded to beat down those men single-handedly. Similarly, Edge speared almost everyone in the ring at one point.
Tazz's frustration peaked here as Matt Hardy was left to stand for ECW in a sea of Raw and Smackdown stars. After his elimination, Tazz said,
"I guess I'll let you guys call this match now, I'm done."
Another injury occured when both Edge and Batista attempted to spear each other. This seemed to be a matter of miscommunication as Batista and Edge both have the same finisher. They ended up cracking skulls in the middle of the ring. Batista was left alone in the corner while he started to bleed profusely. He looked dazed, as though he wasn't quite sure what had happened. When he stood he was wobbly, and it was clear that he probably had some sort of concussion. He ended up being eliminated shortly after.
The last three men in the ring were Cena, HHH, and Edge. After eliminating Big Show, Cena and HHH were standing by each other when Edge knocked Cena, who pushed HHH over the top rope. Edge then threw Cena over the rope to win his brand two draft picks.
DRAFT PICK 10: Mr. Kennedy is drafted to Friday Night Smackdown
DRAFT PICK 11: Triple H is drafted to Friday Night Smackdown
I'll start with Kennedy.
This man has already spent plenty of time in Smackdown territory. There's no reason for him to go back. He should be the WWE Champion, and moving him to Smackdown will do nothing for his momentum.
The biggest bombshell, of course, is Triple H being drafted to Smackdown.
This throws everything I said about the Jeff Hardy draft and most of the others out the window. I think this is a great move for Smackdown and gives them a chance to regain some of the prestige they had when men like Kurt Angle, The Rock, and the Undertaker were fixtures of that show. Triple H lends the brand some real star power, and that should help tremendously while also freeing up the Raw roster to bring us some new championship blood.
Other highlights of the night include a promo by Chris Jericho that was answered by Shawn Michaels. When he came down to the ring, Y2J attacked HBK and they spilled outside the ring. Jericho gave HBK a drop toehold and HBK took a nasty dive on the corner of an announce table. It appeared the corner of the table went directly into HBK's eye. It was hard to tell if it was a work or a shoot, as the action quickly halted and EMT's rushed to ringside. Jericho only looked on and headed up the ramp.
And finally, Vince McMahon, of course, had the last laugh. After giving away a grand prize of $500,000, there was an explosion on the stage. After getting to the floor, a pice of the set (the sign with the giant McMahon dollar bill) "blew up" and "collapsed" onto Vince, who was under the stage. The wrestlers in the ring (who had just finished their battle royal) rushed to the scene and tried to move the sign off of McMahon. EMT's and staff came out and tried to move Vince out from under the sign. Triple H could be heard conferring with the staff as to what to do and that he was afraid more of the stage would break if they tried to move the sign any more. McMahon was eventually recovered from under the stage using a stretchboard and a neckbrace.
Moments later, WWE.com reported that due to the night's "tragic incident", McMahon's Million Dollar Mania has been suspended indefinitely.
Of course, who cares about the Chairman of the Board's condition?
And with that, what should've been one of the best Raw's in recent memory came to an agonizing close.
Overall, I think the moves of the draft were smart. Triple H going to Smackdown is going to help both shows tremendously. Smackdown got the best of night, and I think they will be a better product as a result.
ECW of course, was buried. With only one victory in the night (resulting in one draft pick) they looked weak and out of place with Raw and Smackdown. Moving Kane is not going to do anything for either show, but losing their championship will mean the show lacks purpose.
The other result is that one can almost guess what will happen at Night of Champions.
The Intercontinental Championship has not been announced to be defended at that PPV.
However, Smackdown now has posession of both titles, so we know one of them must move to Raw. That means that Edge will most likely lose the World Heavyweight Championship to Batista. Big Show will beat Kane and bring the ECW title back to the ECW brand. None of the other matches present much consequence for the company, but the fact that they chose to have this brand draft before the PPV will not necessarily help buy rates.
But I did enjoy Raw thoroughly this week, even if I am outraged at the absence of Jim Ross from now until WWE realizes what a mistake they've made.
I give it a 7/10. One point is deducted for J.R.'s draft, another for the Million Dollar Giveaway (which I was able to fast forward through thanks to the magic of DVR) and yet another for the terrible angle they've created as an excuse to put Vince back in the spotlight and stop giving away money (which was a mistake to begin with).
Mr. McMahon also continued his Million Dollar Mania giveaway as he bestowed his money upon several lucky viewers.
Since most of the show remained unchanged, I will concentrate mainly on the picks themselves.
For those who didn't get to see the show the formula was as such: all the matches for the night were interpromotional bouts (meaning each brand faced opponents from a different brand) with the winner(s) giving their brand the next draft pick, meaning that whichever Superstar was randomly selected would be drafted to the brand that won the match.
This was a nice formula that put together some intriguing matchups and also gave the matches themselves some real consequences. The other nice thing about this is that for every draft pick, there MUST be a match, and therefore, the quantity of matches for the night was increased from the average of four to about ten. Granted, this was with an extra hour, but that still boils down to three or four matches an HOUR rather than four or five matches over two hours.
So let's take these matches (and draft picks) in order, shall we?
RAW VS. SMACKDOWN
WWE Champion Triple H vs. "The World's Strongest Man" Mark Henry
I thought this was a very intriguing matchup, though I wondered just how much Triple H would give to make Henry look good. It was a descent match, but of course, no one expected Henry to win. The crowd was firmly behind Triple H the whole time, and in the end, despite Henry's VERY impressive counter to the Pedigree (he actually picked The Game up to reverse it...) Triple gets the win and thus secures the first draft pick for Raw.
DRAFT PICK 1: Rey Mysterio is drafted to Monday Night Raw
I think this is a good choice, though it would not have been my first. Rey has been working very hard over at Smackdown and his popularity continues to rise with each year, especially following his reign as World Champion. He definitely deserves a spot on the flagship broadcast, but I wonder how far he will get with so many stars cluttering up the main event.
RAW VS. SMACKDOWN
TAG TEAM MATCH
Finlay & Hornswoggle vs. Carlito & Santino Marella
Finlay and Hornswoggle pull out the win here in a fun little match. Santino's charisma and ridiculous temper made this more entertaining than it should've been. It was nice to see Smackdown go over Raw for a change, lending some credibility to a struggling brand. So Smackdown gets the next draft pick.
DRAFT PICK 2: Jeff Hardy is drafted to Friday Night Smackdown
I am infuriated by this decision.
Jeff Hardy has worked so hard on Raw, and has only grown more popular despite being suspended for his Wellness Program violation. Even after missing Wrestlemania 24 due to this suspension, he comes back with more crowd support than ever, and it's clear they want to see him in the main event vying for the top title. Then WWE buries him in a 1 Contender's match with John Cena, and suddenly his hope of being an even bigger star in this business is dashed.
My original theory was that he was drafted to Smackdown because they knew if he stayed on Raw they would eventually have to put him over Triple H, which would be blasphemy at this point, so they threw him onto the B-show where he would be able to thrive without any Triple H-sized roadblocks. Justify it however you will, Hardy belongs on Raw.
RAW VS. ECW
TAG TEAM MATCH
World Tag Team Champions Bob Holly & Cody Rhodes vs. Bam Neeley and Chavo Guerrero
At last ECW gets a chance to claim some new stars of it's own.
But they won't. They're up against guys from Raw. The Tag Champs, no less.
Never mind then.
ECW gets buried, of course, giving Raw it's second draft pick.
DRAFT PICK 3: C.M. Punk is drafted to Monday Night Raw
This was pretty much a given, but it's nice to see WWE doing something smart. Punk has been a great hand on ECW, and though his reign as Champion on that brand never quite brought him the stardom it should have, there is little more he can accomplish there. He belongs on Raw where his popularity can continue to rise. Being Mr. Money-in-the-Bank for 2008, it's clear he will be slotted against the Champion at some point, but I would rather see him work up to it, maybe feuding with Chris Jericho for the Intercontinental Championship first. That would be a great program with some terrific wrestling for fans to enjoy. In any case, Punk is where he should've been a long time ago: he's now on the A-show of WWE.
ECW VS. SMACKDOWN
TAG TEAM MATCH
WWE Tag Team Champions The Miz & John Morrison vs. The Hardys
I'm not exactly sure what Vickie Guerrero's purpose here was. Usually she comes out to announce something that will piss the fans off, but today she actually grants them a gift. She told the WWE Tag Champs that it was originally scheduled to be Miz & Morrison vs. Hawkins & Ryder, but that she has changed that and selected new opponents. Matt Hardy's music hits, and the crowd goes crazy, and when Jeff emerges from behind the TitanTron, the roof comes off.
Anyway, I guess they figured since the brothers are on the same brand now (Jeff having been drafted to Smackdown two matches earlier) they can reform their infamous tag team relationship. Unfortunately it's to no avail. A good tag match sees the WWE Tag Team Champions go over the brothers of extreme, granting ECW it's first draft pick of the night.
DRAFT PICK 4: Matt Hardy is drafted to ECW
I'm not exactly sure what the big deal is here. In the first place, Smackdown and ECW share talent anyway, so drafting men between the two shows doesn't seem to make a whole lot of sense.
What this DOES establish is that champions drafted to other brands also bring their titles with them. So the United States Championship is now property of ECW. I'm still not sure what the big deal is. I suspect Smackdown wrestlers will still be able to compete for the title thanks to the sharing of talent.
This seems to be a direct contradiction in the philosophy behind Jeff Hardy's drafting to Smackdown. Whereas Jeff needed Smackdown to get out from under other stars' shadows (specifically Triple H), Matt was already flourishing on Smackdown and had gotten infinitely more popular thanks to the long-awaited defeated of his arch-rival, MVP for the United States Championship. Throwing Matt to ECW won't really change anything because the same stars appear on either show. The only place that really would've reshaped Matt's future is Raw, where of course, he would've suffered the same fate as his brother no matter how good he was.
RAW VS. SMACKDOWN-ANNOUNCERS ONLY DRAFTED
TAG TEAM MATCH
Women's Champion Mickie James & Melina vs. Victoria & Natalya
This match means that ONLY the announcers would be drafted between brands. The match itself was cut short when Melina was knocked off the ring apron and seriously sprained her ankle taking the fall. It is a genuine injury, as you could hear Mickie ask Melina if she was hurt, to wich the latter replied "Yes". The match fell apart as Mickie sought to attend to Melina rather than get back into the ring. You could hear Melina say "I'm sorry" several times to her tag team partner. Eventually Mickie was ambushed by Victoria and Natalya, resulting in, of all things, a double disqualification. While I'm sure the result was inentional, the match itself clearly fell apart. Melina, in tears, was carried from ringside by two men after the conclusion of the match.
As a result of the Double-DQ (I'm still not exactly sure what anyone did WRONG...a double countout may have been better suited here...) both brands were granted a draft pick.
DRAFT PICK 5: "Good Ol' J.R." Jim Ross is drafted to Friday Night Smackdown
DRAFT PICK 6: Michael Cole is drafted to Monday Night Raw
No one is happy with this arrangement. Jerry "The King" Lawler looked absolutely astounded, and J.R. was visibly upset as he took his place over at the Smackdown announce table. Meanwhile, Michael Cole reluctantly took his place next to "The King", who continued to look across the floor to his longtime partner as if waiting for someone to jump out and say, "Gotcha!"
This is the most ridiculous decision of the night.
Even Mick Foley later acknowledged that Jim Ross was "an institution" on Monday Night Raw.
So why the hell is he being drafted to Smackdown?
Michael Cole stated that while he was honored to be a part of Raw (a statement that did more harm to Smackdown than anything...) he felt awkward taking J.R.'s place.
This is a ludicrous decision that will eventually be reversed. While I don't think moving J.R. will impact anyone's ratings, fans will cry out at the sheer blasphemy of moving him to Smackdown. All due respect to Michael Cole (who certainly deserves a spot on Raw), his promotion should not have come at the expense of Raw's legendary annouce team being split up.
RAW VS. SMACKDOWN
John Cena vs. World Heavyweight Champion Edge
This is the "main event", but presented 2/3 of the way through the program. Vince announced this match prior to one of his giveaways.
It was certainly a very entertaining match that saw solid spots by both men. Eventually, John Cena picked up the win, giving Raw yet another draft pick.
DRAFT PICK 7: Batista is drafted to Monday Night Raw
Again, I'm not sure what good this does for Batista. He has become something of an institution himself over on Smackdown and done a great job of holding the main event picture together. Drafting him to Raw will only further confound their main event canvas. Still, it's a nice change of pace. It's been three years since Batista was a full-time member of the Raw roster, but what good is his arrival if he only seeks to run through everyone in the locker room?
SMACKDOWN VS. ECW
Montel Vontavious Porter vs. Tommy Deamer
By now, Tazz has made it very clear that he's frustrated by the fact that ECW has had only one draft pick the whole night. This is the seventh match of the night, and only the third featuring ECW. Meanwhile, Raw has had five mathces resulting in four draft picks. This is Smackdown's sixth match, and they have won themselves two draft picks. Tazz banks on Dreamer to win a second draft pick (and some respect) for ECW, but is sorely disappointed when MVP picks up the win and Smackdown's third draft pick.
DRAFT PICK 8: Umaga is drafted to Friday Night Smackdown
This is another smart move. Umaga is a real force in WWE, but has suffered a few too many losses on Raw. Putting him on Smackdown will help revamp his character and give him fresh opponents. Great decision here.
RAW VS. ECW
John "Bradshaw" Layfield vs. Kofi Kingston
Again, Tazz's frustration with his brand shines through in this match. Despite an excellent showing by Kofi Kingston, he is of course buried when JBL hits the Clothesline from Hell out of nowhere to pick up the win, giving Raw it's fifth draft pick.
DRAFT PICK 9: Kane is drafted to Monday Night Raw
This is in the same vein as the Matt Hardy draft. Kane was only recently drafted to ECW, and then only recently crowned with their Championship just three months ago. Assuming that he will drop the ECW World Championship (which until Sunday is property of Raw) at Night of Champions, Kane is already very familiar with most of the men in the Raw locker room. Kane is a good worker that was becoming a staple of ECW. Now all that will be for nothing as he is once again lost in the crowded Raw roster.
RAW VS. SMACKDOWN VS. ECW
15-MAN TRI-BRAND BATTLE ROYAL
(WINNING BRAND RECEIVES TWO DRAFT PICKS)
Team Raw: ECW World Champion Kane, WWE Champion Triple H, Batista, John Cena, and C.M. Punk
vs.
Team Smackdown: World Heavyweight Champion Edge, The Big Show, The Great Khali, Montel Vontavious Porter, and Jeff Hardy
vs.
Team ECW: WWE Tag Team Champions The Miz & John Morrison, United States Champion Matt Hardy, Chavo Guerrero, and Shelton Benjamin
So the rules are that whichever team wins gets two draft picks. This is, of course, Tazz's dream come true as ECW has a chance to play catch up to Raw and Smackdown. Smackdown's team is the most formidable with both Big Show and Khali there. ECW looked small by comparisson. Raw had the most star power, which was unfortunate to see so bluntly presented.
The match had some interesting moments; particularly when the Hardys stared each other down in the middle of the ring before Jeff began to beat on his brother. Khali was eliminated almost instantly by all the members of Raw and ECW. Big Show then proceeded to beat down those men single-handedly. Similarly, Edge speared almost everyone in the ring at one point.
Tazz's frustration peaked here as Matt Hardy was left to stand for ECW in a sea of Raw and Smackdown stars. After his elimination, Tazz said,
"I guess I'll let you guys call this match now, I'm done."
Another injury occured when both Edge and Batista attempted to spear each other. This seemed to be a matter of miscommunication as Batista and Edge both have the same finisher. They ended up cracking skulls in the middle of the ring. Batista was left alone in the corner while he started to bleed profusely. He looked dazed, as though he wasn't quite sure what had happened. When he stood he was wobbly, and it was clear that he probably had some sort of concussion. He ended up being eliminated shortly after.
The last three men in the ring were Cena, HHH, and Edge. After eliminating Big Show, Cena and HHH were standing by each other when Edge knocked Cena, who pushed HHH over the top rope. Edge then threw Cena over the rope to win his brand two draft picks.
DRAFT PICK 10: Mr. Kennedy is drafted to Friday Night Smackdown
DRAFT PICK 11: Triple H is drafted to Friday Night Smackdown
I'll start with Kennedy.
This man has already spent plenty of time in Smackdown territory. There's no reason for him to go back. He should be the WWE Champion, and moving him to Smackdown will do nothing for his momentum.
The biggest bombshell, of course, is Triple H being drafted to Smackdown.
This throws everything I said about the Jeff Hardy draft and most of the others out the window. I think this is a great move for Smackdown and gives them a chance to regain some of the prestige they had when men like Kurt Angle, The Rock, and the Undertaker were fixtures of that show. Triple H lends the brand some real star power, and that should help tremendously while also freeing up the Raw roster to bring us some new championship blood.
Other highlights of the night include a promo by Chris Jericho that was answered by Shawn Michaels. When he came down to the ring, Y2J attacked HBK and they spilled outside the ring. Jericho gave HBK a drop toehold and HBK took a nasty dive on the corner of an announce table. It appeared the corner of the table went directly into HBK's eye. It was hard to tell if it was a work or a shoot, as the action quickly halted and EMT's rushed to ringside. Jericho only looked on and headed up the ramp.
And finally, Vince McMahon, of course, had the last laugh. After giving away a grand prize of $500,000, there was an explosion on the stage. After getting to the floor, a pice of the set (the sign with the giant McMahon dollar bill) "blew up" and "collapsed" onto Vince, who was under the stage. The wrestlers in the ring (who had just finished their battle royal) rushed to the scene and tried to move the sign off of McMahon. EMT's and staff came out and tried to move Vince out from under the sign. Triple H could be heard conferring with the staff as to what to do and that he was afraid more of the stage would break if they tried to move the sign any more. McMahon was eventually recovered from under the stage using a stretchboard and a neckbrace.
Moments later, WWE.com reported that due to the night's "tragic incident", McMahon's Million Dollar Mania has been suspended indefinitely.
Of course, who cares about the Chairman of the Board's condition?
And with that, what should've been one of the best Raw's in recent memory came to an agonizing close.
Overall, I think the moves of the draft were smart. Triple H going to Smackdown is going to help both shows tremendously. Smackdown got the best of night, and I think they will be a better product as a result.
ECW of course, was buried. With only one victory in the night (resulting in one draft pick) they looked weak and out of place with Raw and Smackdown. Moving Kane is not going to do anything for either show, but losing their championship will mean the show lacks purpose.
The other result is that one can almost guess what will happen at Night of Champions.
The Intercontinental Championship has not been announced to be defended at that PPV.
However, Smackdown now has posession of both titles, so we know one of them must move to Raw. That means that Edge will most likely lose the World Heavyweight Championship to Batista. Big Show will beat Kane and bring the ECW title back to the ECW brand. None of the other matches present much consequence for the company, but the fact that they chose to have this brand draft before the PPV will not necessarily help buy rates.
But I did enjoy Raw thoroughly this week, even if I am outraged at the absence of Jim Ross from now until WWE realizes what a mistake they've made.
I give it a 7/10. One point is deducted for J.R.'s draft, another for the Million Dollar Giveaway (which I was able to fast forward through thanks to the magic of DVR) and yet another for the terrible angle they've created as an excuse to put Vince back in the spotlight and stop giving away money (which was a mistake to begin with).
Wednesday, June 11, 2008
McMahon's Million-Dollar Mediocrity
So this is it: after two weeks of hype that warranted even an entire press conference, the Million Dollar Mania giveaway on Monday Night Raw has finally arrived!
Before I get into the show itself, it should be made clear why Vince decided to do this in the first place.
Apparently the ratings on Monday Night Raw have been slipping for the past several weeks/months/years from the glorious days of the Monday Night Wars in which pro wrestling (WWF and WCW) were pulling numbers like 6.0's and 7.0's. A couple of weeks ago, Monday Night Raw, which has long been the highest rated wrestling product on television, pulled a 2.9.
I covered the issues surrounding this ratings slip in my last blog, so I won't go into detail here. Suffice to say Triple H as champion, a circular and monotonous main event picture, and the utter lack of creative storytelling are crippling the product.
Now, in an effort to draw (buy) back fan allegiance, Vince McMahon has solemnly pledged to bestow up to $1,000,000 every week on his beloved fans. It is part of what McMahon has dubbed "fan appreciation".
Now I know that there are people out there who actually believe this IS simple fan appreciation, and to them I present the following thoughts.
Despite the slip in ratings, WWE's quarterly earnings continue to increase. McMahon continues to pull in hundreds of millions of dollars every year thanks to the patronage of the fans he has. The problem? The ratings have been stagnant for the past quarter at least. That means, that while the ratings haven't changed on Monday Night Raw, money is still being put into Vince McMahon's wallet. So why has it taken McMahon so long to show the fans his "appreciation"? Simple.
Because McMahon could care less about ratings.
Back in 1999-2001 ratings meant something to the wrestling industry. It was the only real way to tell how well you were doing against your competition every week. If Bishcoff pulled a 6.7 and you drew a 5.5, then you lost. Great ratings, and as yet unmatched in wrestling today, but you lost the night to Bischoff. Nowadays, without any real competition to speak of (TNA can't seem to get its product past the 1.0 mark) Vince can sit complacently atop his mountain of McMillions and doesn't have to keep looking over his shoulder to make sure he's still the top dog in the industry.
So why bother to buy ratings with a McMillion Dollar Giveaway?
Because unlike Vince McMahon, the folks at USA STILL depend on the ratings garnered from Monday Night Raw. Raw moved back to USA after a brief tenure on SpikeTV because USA and WWE have a history of great business together from their inception up through the infamous glory days of the "Attitude Era". USA was convinced that bringing Vince back would help their network (which was struggling since WWE left for Spike) to get back on its feet.
In short, USA expected Vince to bring them the 4.5's, 5.0's that he'd brought them before.
With the 2.9 from just a few weeks ago, it is clear that this is not happening, and USA is less than thrilled.
"So, what?" you may ask. "Vince can always find another network."
This is sadly not the case.
It was recently announced that WWE Smackdown! would move from UPN to MyNetworkTV. But it was a long time between the announcement of the end of Smackdown's tenure on UPN and the announcement that it would show up on MyNetworkTV. WWE spun the story to tell us that there was such a race to grab Smackdown! that they were in heavy negotiations with several networks and hadn't made a decision.
The truth is, Smackdown's ratings have been doing even worse than Raw, pulling in 2.4's and such on a regular basis. It's not like in 2001 when Smackdown was almost as hot as Monday Night Raw. Now Smackdown is universaly labeled as "the second-rate wrestling show" or the "watered-down, network television version of Raw". It's not a bad show, but it's not the best, and no one wants a second-rate show on their network.
Unless things take an upswing for Raw, that show will suffer the same fate. No one will want a show that pulls in a meager 2.9; at least no MAJOR network. And without his national exposure on a major network, Vince will lose his audience, and his product will ultimately get lost in a sea of reruns and mediocre broadcasts. He does not want the Paul Heyman treatment, with a 3:00 a.m. timeslot and no investment in his company by the network for such things as promotional materials and advertising.
So McMahon thinks that giving away millions of dollars every week will help spike his ratings. This may be true, and it may not.
Certainly the announcement has caused a decent amount of hype in the mainstream media. It's nothing compared to the "McMahon vs. Trump" hype or even the "Tyson/Austin" hype that he's enjoyed from previous adventures, but it's enough to let everyone know what's going on.
Now one would assume that the simple intrigue of the event would cause viewers to tune in out of curiosity if nothing else.
Everyone did a good job in hyping this event. Even now, two full days after the initial giveaway, the WWE.com page is still headlined by the announcement that another $1,000,000 will be given away next week. My brother watches Law and Order on USA and on more than one occasion I saw ads for upcoming Raw giveaway. The cross-promotion on Sci-Fi with ECW has produced the same results. So it's clear that this is something both the network and Vince are "banking" on (no pun-intended, but I guess it is anyway...).
"So what?" you're still asking, because you're stuborn and refuse to read between the lines. "So what if he wants to giveaway money to grow his company?"
I'm all for the "spend money to make money" philosophy. But giving it away never solved anyone's problems.
And what's the catch to winning the million dollars?
You have to register on WWE.com.
Okay, I registered. Whew, glad that's out of the way.
That's standard procedure.
Step 2?
You MUST tune in to Monday Night Raw to receive the special password you will need when Vince McMahon calls your house.
Really? I MUST tune in to Monday Night Raw?
See, here's the thing.
The good, young, smart, tech-savy folks who run WWE.com would find it simple enough to bestow upon the registrants the secret password they would need immediately after registering. This is often done with online orders and contests. In fact, it is not uncommon for each registrant to have their own UNIQUE password or key to win the contest. So it is not out of the realm of possibility in the case of WWE. But they INSIST that you watch Monday Night Raw and receive the same password that everyone else receives. The same password for the one night.
WWE has now gotten you to visit their website, register for the contest, and watch their product.
Now, when I visited WWE.com to register for the contest last week, they had announced that over 600,000 people had registered for this contest. I guess that's impressive, but when you constantly brag about the millions of fans you have around the world, 600,000 doesn't seem all that great and may account for your low ratings (go figure?). I actually considered the idea that this was WWE's way of performing a census to see who is watching their product. But they could just as easily do that with their Cyber Sunday PPV in which fans log on to WWE.com and vote for the match stipulations and such.
So why the low turnout?
Well, I just realized that fans outside of the continental U.S. are NOT eligible for this contest.
Now, if you're like me, a big flashing red light and a blaring siren much like the "AOOOOOOOGA" sound for a Bugs Bunny cartoon has gone off in your head because you realize that much of, if not the MAJORITY of McMahon's fanbase are outside of the U.S. As central as the U.S. to WWE's operations, think of all the fans they have around the world in places as far off as Japan and as close to home as Canada.
All of these people are not eligible for the contest.
And this is supposed to help ratings.
But the thing is, if I'm not eligible for your McMillion Dollars, why should I be tuning in to your product? On the contrary, why would I even bother to tune in at all, since this ban on overseas exports of your money are a blatant slap in the face to the fans around the world who may only get to attend a single WWE event every year or two and who STILL tune in to watch your product (or had, up until now).
So here comes the show itself.
It was disheartening to see Vince McMahon put on his best "Bob Barker hat" and attempt to turn his beloved product into a prime time gameshow.
Slipping on his grandfather glasses that rather reminded me of my own father whenever he tries to read something off a computer screen, he fumbled around with a modern telephone (the kind with buttons, not a dial) for several long moments before the phone began to ring. Then came the awkward conversation he would have with person on the other end as he cut them off in mid-sentence and was clearly attempting to get straight down to business.
Now I have tuned in to radio stations and television programs that have allowed their audience to call in for either a contest, or simply input.
The conversation usually starts with the host welcoming the guest to the show, upon which the guest will spout off how much they love the product and the host, and the host's girlfriend, and the host's children, and the co-host, and how hot that girl that does the weather really is. After this, when they hosed down their loyal fan, they will ask the question, or for the password/key, whatever. Then they will announce whether the fan has won the contest or not. When they've won, the fan will scream and probably jump up and down without us knowing, because of course, we can't see them. They will then say thank you a hundred times before finally holding on the line to receive their prize.
Now, on Monday Night Raw, for his Million Dollar giveaway, McMahon simply called up his audience, asked if they were watching Monday Night Raw, and then asked for the password. They would give him the password, and then Vince would announce they've won, but there would be no reaction from the fan, presumably, because the guys in the truck have already cut the mic on the phone. So it is hard for those in attendance (who are clearly not eligble to win) or those of us at home (who are cursing because he didn't call us) or those watching overseas or out of the country who know they have no chance of winning, to enjoy the excitement of someone winning a million dollars when they themselves do not appear to be enjoying it.
Why do you think shows like "Deal or no Deal" and "Who Wants to be a Millionaire" are so successful? Because there is suspense, and when the suspense is over, we get to experience the elation of winning by watching the contestants' reactions. That is what drives their product.
For Vince, the experience is:
"Hello? Who am I speaking to? Dan? Dan, this is Vince McMahon from the WWE. Are you watching Monday Night Raw? You are, good. Then you can tell me the secret password. WWE UNIVERSE is correct! Dan, you've just won $200,000! And don't forget ladies and gentlemen, that we will be giving away $250,000 after the break!"
There's no reaction, there's no elation, there's no excitement, it's simply us sitting there watching other people get handed six figures.
This entire process repeats several times throughout the show. In all, I would guess that each givewaway took about five to seven minutes. Which means about 1/4 of the show was spent giving away $1,000,000. Now if I'm in Canada, or the U.K., or Japan, or anywhere that's not the 50 states, that's a half hour of boredome. A half hour bathroom break.
Why did I tune in in the first place?
On a personal note, the entire process reaked of something I'd see on paid programming. It felt so contrived and out of place.
To WWE, the sting would come the next day, when they realized that their ratings had indeed increased.
"Why is that a bad thing?" you ask. "Isn't that what the contest was supposed to do?"
Indeed it was, my friend. Indeed it was.
So a toast to you, Vince McMahon. Your ratings have indeed risen.
Your 2.9 from the week before, is now a 3.0.
Yep. That's not even a joke, or a guess. The official rating for the inaugrual McMillion Dollar giveaway edition of Monday Night Raw is a 3.0.
For those of you keeping score at home, that is a .1 increase over the week before.
For the folks at USA, it means this entire process did nothing.
NOTHING.
The sad part is this falls right in line with the $250,000 Diva Search from years past. Of course, if those women had known that they could've saved their soul from Vince McMahon and simply sat at home and watched Raw for that kind of money, I'm sure we'd have less models and more wrestlers.
Which brings me to next complaint. A half hour is precious time that could be used to put on a more than decent match and even squeeze out a nice promo for, y'know, character development. If you're from WWE creative and don't know that means, it means taking cookie cutter wrestlers like Cody Rhodes and making them into someone that we CARE about.
Vince held a press conference in Times Square for this event.
Why?
Did the whole world really need to know about this? Did the whole world really care?
No.
Because, as I've stated before, Vince McMahon, however many figures are in his bank account, is still just a WRESTLING PROMOTER to general public, and that is not something they will get up and walk to. You have to fight for their attention. Tyson vs. Austin was hot because Tyson and Austin were the hottest things going in their respective sports at the time. Trump vs. McMahon was fairly hot moreso because of Trump's legacy than Vince's. EVERYONE knows who Donald Trump is from "The Apprentice". That's a show on mainstream network television that people are familiar even if they don't watch it. Monday Night Raw is a show on cable television that people are familiar with, but don't want to be. Even if they are familiar with it, they are more familiar with men like Austin, Rock, HHH, and Cena, than they are with McMahon himself.
Vince tried to put out a gameshow, and a bad one at that.
He plans to give away another $1,000,000 this week.
I will be optimistic and assume that Vince's plans simply need time to develop before people tune in on a more regular basis, but alienating much of your audience is not going to do you any favors.
With any luck, this week's Raw may draw a 3.1.
Before I get into the show itself, it should be made clear why Vince decided to do this in the first place.
Apparently the ratings on Monday Night Raw have been slipping for the past several weeks/months/years from the glorious days of the Monday Night Wars in which pro wrestling (WWF and WCW) were pulling numbers like 6.0's and 7.0's. A couple of weeks ago, Monday Night Raw, which has long been the highest rated wrestling product on television, pulled a 2.9.
I covered the issues surrounding this ratings slip in my last blog, so I won't go into detail here. Suffice to say Triple H as champion, a circular and monotonous main event picture, and the utter lack of creative storytelling are crippling the product.
Now, in an effort to draw (buy) back fan allegiance, Vince McMahon has solemnly pledged to bestow up to $1,000,000 every week on his beloved fans. It is part of what McMahon has dubbed "fan appreciation".
Now I know that there are people out there who actually believe this IS simple fan appreciation, and to them I present the following thoughts.
Despite the slip in ratings, WWE's quarterly earnings continue to increase. McMahon continues to pull in hundreds of millions of dollars every year thanks to the patronage of the fans he has. The problem? The ratings have been stagnant for the past quarter at least. That means, that while the ratings haven't changed on Monday Night Raw, money is still being put into Vince McMahon's wallet. So why has it taken McMahon so long to show the fans his "appreciation"? Simple.
Because McMahon could care less about ratings.
Back in 1999-2001 ratings meant something to the wrestling industry. It was the only real way to tell how well you were doing against your competition every week. If Bishcoff pulled a 6.7 and you drew a 5.5, then you lost. Great ratings, and as yet unmatched in wrestling today, but you lost the night to Bischoff. Nowadays, without any real competition to speak of (TNA can't seem to get its product past the 1.0 mark) Vince can sit complacently atop his mountain of McMillions and doesn't have to keep looking over his shoulder to make sure he's still the top dog in the industry.
So why bother to buy ratings with a McMillion Dollar Giveaway?
Because unlike Vince McMahon, the folks at USA STILL depend on the ratings garnered from Monday Night Raw. Raw moved back to USA after a brief tenure on SpikeTV because USA and WWE have a history of great business together from their inception up through the infamous glory days of the "Attitude Era". USA was convinced that bringing Vince back would help their network (which was struggling since WWE left for Spike) to get back on its feet.
In short, USA expected Vince to bring them the 4.5's, 5.0's that he'd brought them before.
With the 2.9 from just a few weeks ago, it is clear that this is not happening, and USA is less than thrilled.
"So, what?" you may ask. "Vince can always find another network."
This is sadly not the case.
It was recently announced that WWE Smackdown! would move from UPN to MyNetworkTV. But it was a long time between the announcement of the end of Smackdown's tenure on UPN and the announcement that it would show up on MyNetworkTV. WWE spun the story to tell us that there was such a race to grab Smackdown! that they were in heavy negotiations with several networks and hadn't made a decision.
The truth is, Smackdown's ratings have been doing even worse than Raw, pulling in 2.4's and such on a regular basis. It's not like in 2001 when Smackdown was almost as hot as Monday Night Raw. Now Smackdown is universaly labeled as "the second-rate wrestling show" or the "watered-down, network television version of Raw". It's not a bad show, but it's not the best, and no one wants a second-rate show on their network.
Unless things take an upswing for Raw, that show will suffer the same fate. No one will want a show that pulls in a meager 2.9; at least no MAJOR network. And without his national exposure on a major network, Vince will lose his audience, and his product will ultimately get lost in a sea of reruns and mediocre broadcasts. He does not want the Paul Heyman treatment, with a 3:00 a.m. timeslot and no investment in his company by the network for such things as promotional materials and advertising.
So McMahon thinks that giving away millions of dollars every week will help spike his ratings. This may be true, and it may not.
Certainly the announcement has caused a decent amount of hype in the mainstream media. It's nothing compared to the "McMahon vs. Trump" hype or even the "Tyson/Austin" hype that he's enjoyed from previous adventures, but it's enough to let everyone know what's going on.
Now one would assume that the simple intrigue of the event would cause viewers to tune in out of curiosity if nothing else.
Everyone did a good job in hyping this event. Even now, two full days after the initial giveaway, the WWE.com page is still headlined by the announcement that another $1,000,000 will be given away next week. My brother watches Law and Order on USA and on more than one occasion I saw ads for upcoming Raw giveaway. The cross-promotion on Sci-Fi with ECW has produced the same results. So it's clear that this is something both the network and Vince are "banking" on (no pun-intended, but I guess it is anyway...).
"So what?" you're still asking, because you're stuborn and refuse to read between the lines. "So what if he wants to giveaway money to grow his company?"
I'm all for the "spend money to make money" philosophy. But giving it away never solved anyone's problems.
And what's the catch to winning the million dollars?
You have to register on WWE.com.
Okay, I registered. Whew, glad that's out of the way.
That's standard procedure.
Step 2?
You MUST tune in to Monday Night Raw to receive the special password you will need when Vince McMahon calls your house.
Really? I MUST tune in to Monday Night Raw?
See, here's the thing.
The good, young, smart, tech-savy folks who run WWE.com would find it simple enough to bestow upon the registrants the secret password they would need immediately after registering. This is often done with online orders and contests. In fact, it is not uncommon for each registrant to have their own UNIQUE password or key to win the contest. So it is not out of the realm of possibility in the case of WWE. But they INSIST that you watch Monday Night Raw and receive the same password that everyone else receives. The same password for the one night.
WWE has now gotten you to visit their website, register for the contest, and watch their product.
Now, when I visited WWE.com to register for the contest last week, they had announced that over 600,000 people had registered for this contest. I guess that's impressive, but when you constantly brag about the millions of fans you have around the world, 600,000 doesn't seem all that great and may account for your low ratings (go figure?). I actually considered the idea that this was WWE's way of performing a census to see who is watching their product. But they could just as easily do that with their Cyber Sunday PPV in which fans log on to WWE.com and vote for the match stipulations and such.
So why the low turnout?
Well, I just realized that fans outside of the continental U.S. are NOT eligible for this contest.
Now, if you're like me, a big flashing red light and a blaring siren much like the "AOOOOOOOGA" sound for a Bugs Bunny cartoon has gone off in your head because you realize that much of, if not the MAJORITY of McMahon's fanbase are outside of the U.S. As central as the U.S. to WWE's operations, think of all the fans they have around the world in places as far off as Japan and as close to home as Canada.
All of these people are not eligible for the contest.
And this is supposed to help ratings.
But the thing is, if I'm not eligible for your McMillion Dollars, why should I be tuning in to your product? On the contrary, why would I even bother to tune in at all, since this ban on overseas exports of your money are a blatant slap in the face to the fans around the world who may only get to attend a single WWE event every year or two and who STILL tune in to watch your product (or had, up until now).
So here comes the show itself.
It was disheartening to see Vince McMahon put on his best "Bob Barker hat" and attempt to turn his beloved product into a prime time gameshow.
Slipping on his grandfather glasses that rather reminded me of my own father whenever he tries to read something off a computer screen, he fumbled around with a modern telephone (the kind with buttons, not a dial) for several long moments before the phone began to ring. Then came the awkward conversation he would have with person on the other end as he cut them off in mid-sentence and was clearly attempting to get straight down to business.
Now I have tuned in to radio stations and television programs that have allowed their audience to call in for either a contest, or simply input.
The conversation usually starts with the host welcoming the guest to the show, upon which the guest will spout off how much they love the product and the host, and the host's girlfriend, and the host's children, and the co-host, and how hot that girl that does the weather really is. After this, when they hosed down their loyal fan, they will ask the question, or for the password/key, whatever. Then they will announce whether the fan has won the contest or not. When they've won, the fan will scream and probably jump up and down without us knowing, because of course, we can't see them. They will then say thank you a hundred times before finally holding on the line to receive their prize.
Now, on Monday Night Raw, for his Million Dollar giveaway, McMahon simply called up his audience, asked if they were watching Monday Night Raw, and then asked for the password. They would give him the password, and then Vince would announce they've won, but there would be no reaction from the fan, presumably, because the guys in the truck have already cut the mic on the phone. So it is hard for those in attendance (who are clearly not eligble to win) or those of us at home (who are cursing because he didn't call us) or those watching overseas or out of the country who know they have no chance of winning, to enjoy the excitement of someone winning a million dollars when they themselves do not appear to be enjoying it.
Why do you think shows like "Deal or no Deal" and "Who Wants to be a Millionaire" are so successful? Because there is suspense, and when the suspense is over, we get to experience the elation of winning by watching the contestants' reactions. That is what drives their product.
For Vince, the experience is:
"Hello? Who am I speaking to? Dan? Dan, this is Vince McMahon from the WWE. Are you watching Monday Night Raw? You are, good. Then you can tell me the secret password. WWE UNIVERSE is correct! Dan, you've just won $200,000! And don't forget ladies and gentlemen, that we will be giving away $250,000 after the break!"
There's no reaction, there's no elation, there's no excitement, it's simply us sitting there watching other people get handed six figures.
This entire process repeats several times throughout the show. In all, I would guess that each givewaway took about five to seven minutes. Which means about 1/4 of the show was spent giving away $1,000,000. Now if I'm in Canada, or the U.K., or Japan, or anywhere that's not the 50 states, that's a half hour of boredome. A half hour bathroom break.
Why did I tune in in the first place?
On a personal note, the entire process reaked of something I'd see on paid programming. It felt so contrived and out of place.
To WWE, the sting would come the next day, when they realized that their ratings had indeed increased.
"Why is that a bad thing?" you ask. "Isn't that what the contest was supposed to do?"
Indeed it was, my friend. Indeed it was.
So a toast to you, Vince McMahon. Your ratings have indeed risen.
Your 2.9 from the week before, is now a 3.0.
Yep. That's not even a joke, or a guess. The official rating for the inaugrual McMillion Dollar giveaway edition of Monday Night Raw is a 3.0.
For those of you keeping score at home, that is a .1 increase over the week before.
For the folks at USA, it means this entire process did nothing.
NOTHING.
The sad part is this falls right in line with the $250,000 Diva Search from years past. Of course, if those women had known that they could've saved their soul from Vince McMahon and simply sat at home and watched Raw for that kind of money, I'm sure we'd have less models and more wrestlers.
Which brings me to next complaint. A half hour is precious time that could be used to put on a more than decent match and even squeeze out a nice promo for, y'know, character development. If you're from WWE creative and don't know that means, it means taking cookie cutter wrestlers like Cody Rhodes and making them into someone that we CARE about.
Vince held a press conference in Times Square for this event.
Why?
Did the whole world really need to know about this? Did the whole world really care?
No.
Because, as I've stated before, Vince McMahon, however many figures are in his bank account, is still just a WRESTLING PROMOTER to general public, and that is not something they will get up and walk to. You have to fight for their attention. Tyson vs. Austin was hot because Tyson and Austin were the hottest things going in their respective sports at the time. Trump vs. McMahon was fairly hot moreso because of Trump's legacy than Vince's. EVERYONE knows who Donald Trump is from "The Apprentice". That's a show on mainstream network television that people are familiar even if they don't watch it. Monday Night Raw is a show on cable television that people are familiar with, but don't want to be. Even if they are familiar with it, they are more familiar with men like Austin, Rock, HHH, and Cena, than they are with McMahon himself.
Vince tried to put out a gameshow, and a bad one at that.
He plans to give away another $1,000,000 this week.
I will be optimistic and assume that Vince's plans simply need time to develop before people tune in on a more regular basis, but alienating much of your audience is not going to do you any favors.
With any luck, this week's Raw may draw a 3.1.
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